Literally Organized

Making sense of maternity leave

2012-02-09T15:45:00.000-05:00

Learning the ins and outs of your company's maternity leave policies can be maddening. For starters, no one you talk to seems to have the right answers, and definitely no one has all the answers. Then, you read about all the benefits the French get when they have babies and you might just drive yourself mad when you find out that as an American you basically get Diddly-Squat.

So, in an effort to help others learn from my experience, I can at least tell you everything I learned. Like everyone else I surely do not have all the answers, but maybe this can get you started.

For me I was so worried about people at my job thinking I was about to have a baby or being all up in my business that I did not talk about baby making or maternity leave with people at work. I spent several years listening intently whenever a colleague would talk about her maternity leave experience, but whenever I asked a follow-up question someone either outright asked me if I was trying to have a baby or asked a friend of mine the same question later on. So I soon gave up on that route and went straight to calling HR to find out all I could.

I called HR a good two years before we even started trying to conceive. I was trying to figure out the "optimal time" as a teacher to give birth. (The answer, if you're curious, would be exactly 12 weeks before the school year ends, since that's how long the Family Medical Leave Act gives for time off work.) While on the phone with several different people from HR I also tried to get their help in making sense of what seemed (and in retrospect still seems) like a complicated maternity leave policy.

Here's my school system's maternity leave policy in a nutshell:

If a woman gives birth during the school year, depending on how she gives birth she gets either 2 weeks or 4 weeks of paid time off (aka Short Term Disability). If she gives birth during the summer she gets no paid time off, but she can take 12 weeks of time off in the fall under the Family Medical Leave Act and receive paid time off provided she uses her own leave.

My school system also publishes this (difficult-to-find) document on its HR website titled "Your Pregnancy and Taking a Leave of Absence" (scroll down to the Disability and Leaves section of this link). It answers many, but not all, of my maternity leave questions.

Here's the long form of that information:
But first, a reminder why any of this matters to begin with...spending time with this sleeping beauty.

...who is increasingly alert during the day!

Part 1: Starting from the day a woman gives birth she goes into a 4-week "elimination period." This horribly titled time period is a 20-work-day window in which she must use her own sick leave (if she has any) and get paid for her 20 days off, or if she does not have sick leave she goes on leave-without-pay status.

Part 2: After the 20-day elimination period the woman goes on Short Term Disability (that comes with the horrible acronym STD...I know because I was just asked to write this on a form). The short-term disability period is 2 weeks if she had a vaginal delivery or 4 weeks for a c-section. Because I had a c-section I won the short-term disability lottery -- holler! This 2 or 4-week period is the time during which the woman receives 100% of her salary whether or not she has leave acrued (and she doesn't use her own leave during this time).

Part 3: By the time a woman has completed what I've called Part 2 of her maternity leave, she has either been out of work for 6 weeks (vaginal delivery) or 8 weeks (c-section). Now she is entitled to either 6 more weeks of leave under FMLA (vaginal delivery) or 4 more weeks of leave (c-section). She can take her leave with or without pay depending on whether or not she has sick leave left over.

Part 4: When the 12-week FMLA period is over a woman may continue to take time off work by filing for a Leave of Absence. In our school system we are allowed to take up to two years off at a time and still retain our job. (Note that this does not mean a woman gets her exact same job held for two years. Instead, she is guaranteed a similar position in the county when she returns, though that position could be at another work location [i.e. school].)

So, when I lay it out for you this way, hopefully this does not seem overly complicated. With me so far? Good.

But then it's time to to understand the difference between Short Term Disability and Family Medical Leave Act.

The FMLA time covers 12 weeks' worth of working days. As teachers we get a generous amount of time off work, such as winter break, spring break, and the majority of federal holidays (though we don't get Veteran's Day, and I'm still not sure why...). So as teachers FMLA gives us exactly 60 work days off. This means that if I had, for example, given birth on Dec. 23 when winter break began my FMLA would not have begun until Jan. 3 when the students reported back to school.

But here's the kicker: Short Term Disability counts calendar days, not working days. Think of Short Term Disability like a stopwatch that starts ticking the moment your baby enters the world. So, had I given birth on Dec. 23 and had a vaginal delivery I would have used up the majority of my Short Term Disability days by virtue of giving birth vaginally over a break. If I had given birth in the middle of the summer, such as some time in July, I would not have gotten any Short Term Disability days. Thankfully Natalie decided to hold off until after the holidays were over.

So, ironically then, as teachers it's to our financial advantage to avoid giving birth during breaks from school because by doing so we lose our 2 or 4 paid weeks of maternity leave (aka Short Term Disability). Avoid giving birth in the summer if you want paid time off! Lesson learned.

Then it's time to fill out the paper work. Here's what I learned:

1) Because I needed to use my own sick days for my 20-day elimination period, before I left work I filled out 4 weeks' worth of blank time sheets for my secretary. I left them with her so that she can fill in the dates and submit them for me while I'm gone.

2) Our school system uses Liberty Mutual (1-800-524-0740) as the neutral third-party to handle disability claims. I had been instructed to call Liberty Mutual to begin my claim process at least 30 days before my due date. So I called 35 days before my due date. When I called the woman I spoke to said I was calling too soon. I said I was calling at least 30 days before my due date. She only agreed to work with me because my last day of work was the day winter break began, so when I spoke to her I was less than 30 days from my last day of work. I guess if I had been planning to work up until my due date I would have had to have called back later. Seems odd all around -- if you want women to call exactly 30 days before their due date then you need to state that directly. Liberty Mutual sent me a Medical Release form for my doctor's office that authorized Liberty Mutual to access my medical information from my doctor as needed to handle my disability claim. (Again, interestingly enough, when I contacted Liberty Mutual to initiate my claim the woman I spoke to asked me if I had submitted my Medical Release form. I said I did not yet have a Medical Release form because I thought that's what she would be sending me today. It felt like a game of Who's on First?)

3) I needed to call Liberty Mutual when Natalie was born informing them of the birthday and method of delivery. They beat me to it, though, and called me multiple times during the 10-day waiting period between Natalie's due date and her birthday. I did call them from the hospital, though, the day after her birth and let them know I had a c-section.

4) After Liberty Mutual filed my Short Term Disability claim with my school system I received a letter in the mail from Liberty Mutual telling me they had initiated my claim.

5) Last week, three weeks after Natalie's birth, I received a call from my school system's Disabilities Office. They wanted to know when I intend to return to work, and the answer is not for the remainder of this school year. They needed me to fill out two forms:

Form 1: an FMLA form A. This form requires my principal's signature. I knew I needed to get this form filled out, I just wasn't sure when. It requires including Natalie's birthday as the Beginning Date of Absence. I should have filled it out prior to leaving work in December and just left the dates blank (and trusted that my principal would trust me to fill it out appropriately). The top of this form says I need to fill out the Certification of Health Care Provider form along with this form, but that is just a trick! I don't need that form after all. Complicated, right?

Form 2: Request for Leave of Absence form. Because my FMLA time off ends April 13 and I plan to take the remainder of the school year off, my leave of absence officially begins April 16. Even though the top of this form indicates that I need to submit this form by March 31 to take time off for the upcoming school year, I can disregard that instruction as well and simply return this form to HR for this school year asap.

Believe it or not, although this may sound complicated, handling my maternity leave questions has actually been much easier than handling my state teaching license questions from back in my first year of teaching.

I hope when you take maternity leave that you have a good benefits system in place wherever you work, and I hope if you work for the same school system as I do you'll be able to use this knowledge to your advantage!

Newborn products: The MVPs

2012-02-05T15:45:00.001-05:00

I am sure as Natalie grows I will have reflections on products that helped get us through each stage. While we already have items on hand for late in her first year and into the toddler years, for now I can only comment on the items we've used the most during her first few weeks of life. These are the items that, if I was doing it over again, I would make sure I had on hand before she was born. (Quite a few of these items I picked up since her birth, even though I previously thought we couldn't possibly need to bring any more baby items into our home for a long time.)

Sleep
Graco Pack 'N Play with bassinet attachment in Kensly
Keeping Natalie in her Pack 'N Play next to my side of our bed has worked out perfectly so far. She wakes up 2-3 times per night for a diaper change and feeding, and having her at arms reach has made the process much easier. Last night I was able to soothe her back to sleep while just holding her hand. (This required me putting my pillow right next to the edge of her bassinet, but it still worked.)

While our Pack 'N Play doesn't have all the bells and whistles of the other Pack 'N Play products, frankly I can't imagine needing anything more than this device provides. I know the Pack 'N Play is criticized as being cumbersome for travel, but, having not yet carted it around an airport, I don't find it particularly heavy either.

Graco quilted Pack 'N Play sheets -- get 2!
I don't know if it truly matters or not, but Graco encourages consumers to use the sheets it manufactures for the Pack 'N Play sets. I am fairly certain this is mostly a marketing scheme, but I gave in and got two of these sheets. At first I had only one on hand, which was silly because it just meant more laundry.

Halo Sleep Sack Swaddles -- micro-fleece, newborn size, get 2!
This wearable blanket has been great for keeping Natalie warm and safe at night. The micro-fleece is wonderful for a winter baby, and the newborn size fits infants from 6-12 pounds, which is most likely when you'll want to swaddle your baby. We are swaddling Natalie with her arms out (rather than arms in as you'll see in the photo below) because, believe it or not, Natalie has already proven that she can roll onto her stomach so we don't want to take any chances with her having her arms encased in the swaddle and her face down on the mattress. One of our Halo swaddles came with Velcro closures, the other did not, even though I thought I was ordering the exact same product. The verdict? I prefer the Velcro kind -- easier to keep in place.

Infant gowns -- have 4-6 on hand
I mentioned these before, but these make changing diapers in the middle of the night so much easier. Just lift up the gown to see if it's time for a diaper change rather than deal with snaps or zippers at 3 a.m. Sizing doesn't matter much here. We have some gowns that are size 3 months, some that say 0-3 months, and one that says "one size fits all," and all of them fit Natalie.

Bath time
Safety 1st Comfy Bath Cushion
I know a lot of people like to bathe their newborns in the kitchen sink, but I've been hesitant to try that out thanks to our granite countertops and wood floors in the kitchen. If the little lady bumped her head (or, let's get real, WE bumped her head) it wouldn't be too pleasant. Instead we've opted for bathing her in the hallway bathroom's bath tub. We put this cushion inside her baby bathtub...

Fisher-Price Precious Planet Whale of a Tub
...the frog sponge helps keep Natalie in place since she can't completely control her neck or sit up in the tub.

Circo Bath Time Kneeling Pad (from Target)
...and this pad is keeping my knees from giving way while I crouch over the bath tub.

Hooded towels and baby washcloths -- at least 3 hooded towels and 6 washcloths.
We had just 2 hooded towels on hand before Natalie's arrival, and since she was born we've received quite a few as gifts. This was great because we could use more and Natalie gets the luxury of a totally clean towel every time she's bathed (which is not a luxury I indulge myself in). Two good types of baby wash cloths are these terry velour ones by Swaddle Designs and the ever-popular Aden + Anais line with its so-soft muslin fabric.

Clothing
Hats! -- well, I should say hat as you really only need one...
We have not bought Natalie a single hat, yet she owns at least a dozen. The cutest one that gets all the compliments is this adorable knit bunny ears hat from Baby Gap. It's size 0-6 months.

Zippered footed onesies -- get 4-8. We needed newborn size (despite having an 8-lb. baby)
These are by far the easiest items to dress your newborn in. We have about 4-5 footed onesies in newborn size with snaps and about 4-5 footed onesies in newborn size with zippers. We dress Natalie in both snaps and zippers equally, but I hear less noise emanating from the nursery (both from Natalie and from Matt) when Matt's doing a diaper change when Natalie's in a zippered onesie. Newborn outfits with pants are cute, and we like dressing Natalie in these as well, but they're much more impractical than the zippered footed onesie.

On the go
Graco SnugRidger Infant Car Seat Stroller Frame (aka Snap 'N Go)
Thanks to unusually high winter temperatures we've been taking Natalie on lots of walks. This stroller frame has held up perfectly. I know friends and relatives who live in more urban areas with rough pavement find jogging strollers are the way to go, but for us living in our suburban, ridiculously-clean-and-manicured paradise this really basic stroller frame does the job well.

Car seat
Now, as far as car seats are concerned, I feel like I can't speak with much authority here, seeing as if I did it over again I probably would not choose our Graco SnugRide 35 Infant Car Seat because it is so big. We've had a chance to compare it to other people's infant car seats, and ours is definitely the big one. I can't tell you with authority which is the better car seat to choose, size-wise, so maybe some readers can reply with comments on what infant car seat they'd recommend. (Please do!)

Stroller blanket
Instead of getting any attachments for the infant car seat, such as the popular JJ Cole bunting, we've been bundling Natalie with a stroller blanket around two-thirds of her body when we take her for a car ride or a stroller walk. My sister-in-law bought us this beautiful Petunia Pickle Bottom stroller blanket and we take it everywhere.

Nursing
Medela Easy Expression Bustier
This is the hands-free breast pump bra. Without it you're subjecting yourself to 10-20 minutes of holding your arms up while you milk yourself. With it you buy yourself 10-20 minutes to send emails, make phone calls, or write your blog (just kidding on that last one). You will be shocked to know how many of your female friends look like the woman below when they are communicating with you electronically. Ahhh, modern women.

UPDATE: Realize I left these two important items off initially: nursing camis and nursing bras

A Pea in the Pod nursing tank
Awesome and universally flattering. I have a nursing cami from Target, and based on its inability to enhance my shape (or I would argue most women's shapes) I was happy to spend twice as much money for these way better camis from A Pea in the Pod.

A Pea in the Pod seamless clip-down nursing bra
So comfortable it's kind of like a sports bra, but way more flattering.

Lansinoh Breast Milk Storage Bags
If you are trying to stockpile your breastmilk in the freezer like I am so you can, you know, get a hair cut, go to the doctor's office, or have a few hours to spend with your girlfriends, these bags are a must-have.

Lansinoh Disposable Nursing Pads
These are particularly useful to wear at night, I've found, even though they're primarily intended to keep you from experiencing the wet T-shirt contest look while out in public.

Lansinoh HPA Lanolin
I had this nipple cresm on hand in case I needed it, and I used it several times in the very beginning. I can't say that for me this product is a true MVP because I've been so lucky with breastfeeding, but I know it's a godsend to lots of breastfeeding moms.

Boppy pillow with slipcover -- I recommend two Boppys (if you live in a multi-story house) and a couple extra slipcovers.
I did not use the Boppy at first, mostly because I was feeding Natalie in the NICU and I was still dealing with a healing c-section incision. Now that Natalie is slightly heavier and my c-section incision is fully (or at least almost fully) healed, I'm finding the Boppy is helping to keep me from arching my back too much. Now I want a second Boppy so I don't have to carry it and the baby up and down the stairs several times a day.

Aden + Anais Burpy Bibs -- buy at least 6.
These burp cloths are like Burp Cloths 2.0 because they double as bibs when your babe is a little older, they come in adorable designs, and the classic Aden + Anais muslin cloth is so soft. We always have four burp cloths in rotation at once -- one next to the Pack 'N Play, one in the nursery, one in the living room, and one in my purse (I haven't yet started using my diaper bag because we've only taken Natalie out for short trips to the doctor and a couple restaurants [where she slept like a champ!]).

Bottle feeding
Dr. Brown's BPA Free Natural Flow Bottles -- buy 3 of the 4-ounce bottles for getting started.
Natalie needs to be burped often, so we opted for these bottles that (at least claim to) reduce colic, spit up, burping and gas. Others have critiqued these bottles as being too difficult to clean because they involve multiple parts, but I have not seen this as a problem. We pop them in the dishwasher using the....

Oxo Tot Dishwasher Basket
...to corral all the bottle parts and accessories.

Boon Grass Countertop Drying Rack
Some of the bottles and accessories come out of the dishwasher needing some extra time to air out, so this little drying rack is both cute and functional.

Miscellaneous
Philips Avent Soothie Pacifier -- 0-3 months, pack of 2
I mentioned this in yesterday's NICU post, but even though these were items we did not have on hand at first they have been helpful in calming Natalie when all else fails.

Multiple changing pad covers
Although one of my trying-not-to-go-insane tasks I completed while waiting for Natalie to arrive was the creation of a diaper caddy, we've found we prefer to change Natalie in her nursery on her changing pad. Seeing as the first night home from the hospital she soiled one changing pad cover, we were happy to have another one on hand. Additionally, we've learned to take plain burp cloths (not the Aden + Anais kind) and place them underneath Natalie when changing her for added protection.

Covered trash can for the nursery
I did not want a Diaper Genie in the nursery because I hate how they look and the fact that they only serve one function. Instead I picked up a small metal trash can at Home Goods for diaper and wipe disposal (we'll have a different system in place when we transition to cloth diapers). It has a detachable pail that makes trash day easy to handle, and the seal on the trash can is strong enough that it's kept offensive odors out of the nursery.

UPDATE: I also realize I initially left off this important item: infant swing!

Fisher Price Nature's Touch Cradle Swing
The exact swing we own, because it's a hand-me-down, doesn't appear to be sold anymore, but all the Fisher Price infant swings are roughly the same. I know the Fisher Price My Little Lamb swing is quite popular right now and essentially identical to the swing we own. This swing is perfect for putting Natalie in for a day-time nap. Half of her day-time naps seem to take place in my arms (or Matt's arms), and the other half happen in this swing in our living room.

What I left off...
I have not included diapers or wipes because, while those are clearly needed, you can wait and use up your hospital-issued supply before you go out to buy more. With diapers in particular you may want to wait until you know how big your baby is before you get extras because an over-8-lb. baby will need to be in size 1 diapers (Pampers Swaddlers, at least) whereas an under-8-lb. baby will need to be in size newborn diapers.

I also did not include a bulb syringe nasal aspirator because hopefully you'll be given one at the hospital, but if not this is definitely something to have on hand.

That's my list! I am interested to hear from the parents out there about what you recommend having on hand for those early weeks of life.

NICU culture: Blessings in disguise

2012-02-04T10:18:00.001-05:00

I was talking to my friend Mimi the other day during a beautiful June-uary mid-afternoon walk and she asked me a poignant question: Did I feel resentful about Natalie's labor and delivery story? The answer to that question is no. As I told Mimi, although it didn't happen the way I would have chosen, I knew going into this process that I would have little control over the way everything occurred. I did, however, respond that I feel some resentment regarding Natalie's NICU stay, particularly the 40 hours I was sequestered and not allowed to visit her.

But, as easy as it is to wallow in self pity, basically ever since it finally registered that Natalie was, in fact, going to spend the majority of her first week of life away from us, I tried to look at the good in the NICU experience. Although I am not a religious or even spiritual person, I do believe in the concept of things happening for a reason. I tried to think positively while she was in the NICU. With the clarity that comes with hindsight I've come to terms with all the blessings in disguise that the NICU gave our little family.

Blessing 1: If you can make it here, you can make it anywhere.

In a way, the NICU is a lot like the vision of New York that Sinatra sang about. Neither Matt nor I had any experience with infant care before Natalie entered the world. We had not changed a diaper. So, we learned to change Natalie's diapers through the holes of the incubator she was housed in, with all the IV lines and sensor cords attached to her. We learned to give her a sponge bath with a nurse's assistance. We finally understood how to use the bulb aspirator. We gave her bottles and burped her. Basically, we got eased into parenthood under the supervision of what are no doubt some of the world's greatest medical professionals.

Pictured above, our absolutely favorite nurse. She deserves a medal, but the best we can probably do is bring her bagels and a nice note.

Blessing 2: Breastfeeding support

My nurses up in Family Centered Care, where I was recovering while Natalie was housed in the NICU, knew I wanted to breastfeed. So, just hours after Natalie was whisked away in the early hours of Friday morning they brought me a hospital-grade breast pump (the Ameda Elite) and had me get to work. They knew that I needed to pump if I was going to be successful once Natalie and I were reunited. One bonus is that they gave me all the attachments I'd need (which cost roughly $40) for free since Natalie was in the NICU.

The Ameda Elite hospital pump costs $950 to purchase at the hospital, but I could rent it for $19 a week or $72 a month from my hospital. I'm glad I didn't buy a heavy-duty pump before Natalie was born because I'll continue to rent this one for a while.

Here's the bottom line: breast pumps are no fun but totally necessary. One particularly patient nurse sat with me while I attempted to fill these tiny syringes with colostrum (the yellow stuff women produce before the actual breast milk comes in). To my (and her) shock, she helped me fill three syringes on my first attempt. They are a pain and a half to work with, but sending these syringes of colostrum down to Natalie in the NICU made me feel like I was doing something productive when I couldn't see her.

Of course, the first lactation consultation I met with came into my hospital room as I was in my final minute of pumping, round 2. In an attempt to help she grabbed the breast pump, eh, suction cups (?) off my boobs and spilled everything I'd spent 20 minutes pumping. I started to cry. That was a breast feeding low point.

After I requested that the horrible lactation consultant never visit me again, I met with three different lactation consultants, including one who specifically works with mothers of NICU patients. The NICU consultant was perhaps the most helpful, but all three women were good despite the fact that they literally all gave me very different advice. Finally, as I was sitting in the middle of the NICU bare-chested (lost my shame a long time ago in this process, if you'll recall) with Natalie draped across me, her splinted arm with its IV line across my stomach and various plastic bits from all her tubes poking into me as I tried to keep her off my c-section incision, the NICU lactation consultant asked me if she was latching on and if I was comfortable. I could reply yes to both. She said that's good because the technique I was using she would never recommend to anyone but if it worked for me I should keep going. Yes, in the circumstances, this was working and it was the best I could do.

As with all other aspects of infant care, I knew that if I could learn to breast feed Natalie in this environment we would get home and everything would be fine. That prophecy indeed came true.

Blessing 3: Versatile baby!

Like most mothers-to-be out there I read a bunch of baby books and talked to lots of friends who'd given birth over the years and soaked up all the information I could. I had heard enough about seemingly classic conundrums such as nipple confusion that I was determined to follow a regimented schedule: Natalie would not use a pacifier; she would get a bottle between 2-3 weeks of life after my breast milk supply was established and a breast feeding routine was well under way.

All these plans went out the window the moment Natalie was admitted to the NICU.

To soothe babies in the NICU, who, like Natalie, can't be held for long because they need to be in their incubators and/or underneath the bilirubin lights (or in her case underneath an oxygen hood for her pneumonia treatment), the nurses use pacifiers (the Philips Avent Soothies kind).

Because Natalie was separated from me, we obviously could not breast feed on a normal schedule, so she immediately needed not only an IV line but also supplemental formula (the NICU uses Enfamil Ready to Use newborn formula).

She was released from her incubator every three hours for a temperature check, diaper change, and feeding. Matt and I tried to get to as many of these feedings as we could, but inevitably we couldn't go to every single one, so Natalie was often handled by the awesome nurses.

The point of all this is that even though we were not caring for Natalie ourselves the way we would have chosen had she been with us at home, at least partially as a result of her NICU care Natalie is incredibly versatile. She takes a pacifier but isn't reliant on it. She takes a bottle of my breast milk about once a day from Matt. I love the freedom this gives me to run an errand or meet a friend for a few hours. But neither the pacifier nor the bottle created "nipple confusion" (a concept all our nurses essentially described as a crock). She doesn't need to be held by me to be soothed -- she will gladly fall asleep on anyone. And because she learned to sleep in a loud environment with beeping machines, crying babies and sirens blaring often, she can sleep anywhere. She is not the kind of baby who is woken up by barking dogs, ringing phones, door bells, the TV, loud voices....basically anything. You do not need to adjust your volume around Natalie. I have to attribute at least some of these qualities to her NICU experience.

Blessing 4: Free stuff

This may sound ridiculous, seeing as the NICU is a very serious place, but while receiving what the nurses aptly described as "the most expensive babysitting in the world" we also got a lot of free stuff. All my breast pumping supplies were free, which was great, and we received double portions of all the baby care items the hospital hands out for free to take home, such as diapers, wipes, and formula starter packs, but the most noteworthy free items would be the classes NICU parents can take.

The NICU has social workers who visit all the parents and inform parents of available classes and other services. Although our stay was so short we only participated in one class, I really like the fact that there are even classes such as scrapbooking that help parents bond with each other and take their minds off the heartache they are dealing with (while documenting their child's early weeks, or sadly, months of life).

We expressed interest in taking Infant CPR, and the two days later we were in the class. This was a class we were going to shell out $150 for through our hospital's parent education classes. (To put this in perspective, you may recall that we paid $100 for Natalie's labor and delivery, my extended hospital stay, and Natalie's week in the NICU -- thank you, health insurance.)

Everything we learned in our Infant CPR class will be subject of a future blog post, but for now I'll give you this little preview with the infant blow-up dummy we brought home from the class (which Matt has determined will somehow get worked into Natalie's first Halloween costume, perhaps as her evil twin).

In the Infant CPR class, we interacted with other NICU parents. We were by far the ones with the shortest stay. One mother who was there gave birth to twin boys January 1. One twin was transported to our hospital (because it's known for having a NICU so advanced it's like it's on steroids) and the other remained about 30 minutes away in the NICU of the hospital where they were born. This single mother (who also didn't speak English) expected for her babies to be released from the NICU in April. Sitting beside her we felt like absolute frauds, getting out of jail free, as the case may be. One of our nurses told us that the shortest NICU stay she's seen is five days and the longest is 250. We are indeed lucky.

As I learn to increasingly accept the things I cannot control, looking at all the hidden benefits of our NICU experience has been a great exercise.

The best postpartum gifts

2012-01-30T12:22:00.000-05:00

We have continued to be incredibly fortunate to have the most generous family and friends in the world. Before visitors arrive or friends from far away are in touch, everyone wants to know what they can bring. I've been impressed with not only the generosity but also creativity of these visitors and subsequently awesome gift bearers. Because pre-baby I always struggled with what to give someone who's just had a baby (I hate being a redundant gift giver) I thought I'd share with you some of the cool items we've been appreciating lately.

The obvious one is home-cooked meals. Particularly thoughtful friends have spent time researching good foods for breastfeeding moms. As a result we've had some great dinners delivered to us including steak and peppers, Greek salad with chicken, chicken pot pie, brown-sugar marinated chicken and rice, lentil stew, veggie stew, meatball soup, turkey meatloaf...just to name a few. Friends have also delivered awesome sides and desserts such as corn muffins, blueberry muffins (a great breakfast treat), whoopie pies, brownie/cookie bars, and lactose-free brownies (for Matt's diet). Seeing as I can use plenty of calories, I've been thoroughly enjoying some extra dessert as well!

Other awesome gifts include:
Personalized items containing Natalie's name -- since we kept her name a secret from the world, it's been fun to receive in the mail several items containing her name or initials.

Newborn clothing -- we underestimated how much newborn clothing we would need, and with the exception of one outfit, we did not receive any gifts of newborn clothing before Natalie was born. So, it's been great to receive a few sets of footed zipper onesies (the easiest thing to clothe a baby in during the day) and newborn gowns (the easiest thing to clothe a baby in during the night -- makes late-night diaper changes quite simple!). One discovery: Carter's newborn clothing has fit our baby perfectly; the Circo brand at Target has been slightly bigger.

Diapers -- we're going to switch to our cloth Bum Genius 4.0 diapers once Natalie is closer to 12 pounds. Seeing as that will take a while, for now we are using the Pampers Swaddlers that everyone, including the hospital staff, seems to prefer. The 90 diapers we got sent home with from the hospital lasted for about 10 days, and now we've been digging into the massive supply some of our friends brought us last week. Also, on a related note: wipes! These are another item everyone has to have on hand, and we went through 72 wipes in 6 days (since then I think we have learned how to better use the wipes so we can now be more conservative with wipe use).

Magazines/books/Kindle gift cards -- My awesome friend who came to the hospital to be with Matt and me during discharge (aka the worst moment of my life as we left Natalie in the NICU) came bearing about 6 magazines ranging from People and Us Weekly to Real Simple and Vogue. In case you were wondering, this is an amazing arsenal of magazines to have on hand while breastfeeding or waiting for your baby to fall asleep in your arms. I'm also taking full advantage of my new Kindle and trying to read uplifting, hilarious works. This week's pick was Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? by Office writer and generally funny lady Mindy Kaling (I have a thing for women in comedy). It also happens to be this month's book club read.

Candles -- this is a special request I gave a group of girlfriends who visited the other week. Because I'm adjusting to my new lifestyle of spending most of my waking hours at home as opposed to most of my waking hours at work, I'm loving creating a peaceful, soothing environment here. That means keeping some candles burning as often as possible. It's one thing I did not think to stock up on pre-baby. Another item that goes with this: candle lighters, which for me means one for each level of the house.

Comfortable, breastfeeding-friendly clothes -- OK, this is one I bought for myself, but I was thrilled to have one of my best friends along with me for the shopping excursion I went on about a day after arriving home from the hospital, while Natalie was still in the NICU. We went to Target and Destination Maternity (which is a combo A Pea in the Pod [expensive maternity store] and Motherhood Maternity [pedestrian maternity store] housed under one roof down the street from my house). At Target I got the world's most comfortable robe (with the world's biggest robe pockets, which are large enough to house a Kindle, an iPhone and several baby bottles) and a couple on-clearance button-less cardigans for around-the-house wear. Then we picked up several nursing bras and nursing tanks at Destination Maternity. Pre-baby I had only purchased one nursing bra, not knowing what my preferences and lifestyle would be like, but a baby in the NICU meant I needed lots more nursing-friendly undergarments, stat!

Anything remaining from the baby registry -- I've been trying to keep our baby registry as up-to-date as possible. When I order something from Amazon or Diapers.com, I make sure to take it off our registry. I know most people don't want to buy the most utilitarian items from a registry, such as a crib sheet or a set of infant bottles, but turns out those are the things you most need, so in a pinch, you'll just order it yourself. I did this for a Pack N Play crib sheet the other day. Thankfully, with a Diapers.com coupon and a few more items on the order I got free shipping and the order I placed one afternoon arrived the following afternoon.

Speaking of...
Gift certificates to Amazon, Diapers.com or the store where the couple registered -- Again, no matter how prepared you are before the baby's arrival, there are going to be items you need soon after the baby arrives. We were more conservative with some purchases and some items on our registry, figuring we needed to test the items out with our baby before we committed to getting more. This is the time when you're least keen on going out to stores to pick up these miscellaneous items, so online shopping is, in fact, a godsend. As those of you with babies are probably already well aware, Diapers.com typically has higher prices than Amazon, and Amazon has a program called Amazon Mom which allows users to reap most of the benefits of an Amazon Prime membership for free. As fate would have it, though, beginning on January 12 (Natalie's birthday, for those of you keeping track) Amazon temporarily suspended new enrollments in the Amazon Mom program, so now we're on the waiting list. This is why when I got a couple good offers from Diapers.com I jumped on the coupons and free shipping which ultimately led to a better deal than what I could currently get on Amazon.

What have you appreciated having on hand during your postpartum period?

My c-section recovery

2012-01-26T18:30:00.000-05:00

First of all, let me say that I realize Natalie's labor and delivery story may have freaked some people out. I knew this going in, but I firmly believe in being armed with as much knowledge as possible, so I hope my story is also somewhat empowering so that those of you who haven't had children yet can go in with eyes wide open, as I like to say, and that if you're like me more knowledge may actually make you less freaked out. Of course, my good friend has already warned our other mutual friend, set to deliver her first child in May, to avoid reading my blog for the time being.

Too bad she'll miss out on adorable baby photos randomly included for your viewing pleasure!

So, today I want to highlight a lot of positives. I will warn you, though, before you get any further that I will again be keeping it very real in this post, so if that bothers you, read at your own discretion.

And when I share with you, hopefully tomorrow, a more detailed account of our time spent in the NICU, I hope you'll see all the positives in that, too, oddly enough. I am not one to lie, so when I say there are lots of positives to be had, well, that is me being blatantly honest. I am the world's worst liar.

My baby-making experience can be summarized as follows:

Degree of difficulty...

Trying to conceive -- medium (a lot of people have it way worse...trying to keep perspective)
Pregnancy -- extremely easy
Labor and delivery -- average difficulty (you may find this hard to believe, but I was hardly in any pain even before getting the epidural, and getting the epidural was not bad at all, and the whole experience took place in less than 24 hours, so I chalk it all up to a small victory)
Leaving our baby in the NICU after leaving the hospital -- worst moments of our lives (even though our stay was about as short as possible)
Postpartum period and c-section recovery -- easy
Taking care of a newborn -- easy (so far....famous last words?)

Today I'll focus on my c-section recovery, since at this point two weeks after having given birth I would say I am 95% healed. Yes, you read that correctly. I think I am basically back to my old self, and in some ways, dare I say it, better than my old self. This is one of those positive stories I've been wanting to share and hoping it will, if nothing else, not keep my best friends from ever deciding to have kids.

Ironically, during our Childbirth Express class after she'd spent approximately 5 minutes barely scratching the surface of the c-section birth experience, the one question I asked the nurse in front of the entire class was, "Could you talk for a few minutes about the c-section recovery process?" With a confused expression on her face, she asked what I meant. I elaborated by asking her to talk about items such as incision maintenance, using the stairs, pain management, etc. She didn't really answer my question, after all, and simply said these are things we'd learn about if and when we had a c-section. Not particularly helpful, considering approximately 30% of births end up as c-sections and we were at a class to get informed in advance.

It also wasn't helpful that out of all the women I've been close enough with to ask questions about their labor and delivery stories over the last five years only one of them had a c-section. Her story, for what it's worth, was at least relatively similar to mine in that she almost went all the way through with a vaginal delivery before the doctors cut her off and performed a c-section. So, at least as I was crying my eyes out on the way to the operating room, I could take some comfort in thinking of my friend who'd been in this situation.

Well, here's what I would say today if I was running that Childbirth Express class, C-Section Edition.

Walking
This is one item that I'd read would be unpleasant. In reality, it really wasn't bad at all. Now, I will say that unlike most moms in c-section recovery at the hospital, I did not have a baby in my room to attend to. But in some ways I actually feel like as I was finally coming out of my drug-induced haze in the early hours of Friday morning approximately 10 hours after her delivery, Natalie's NICU stay provided me with extra motivation to work hard to get back into shape and really meet my little girl.

Quick walking timeline review:

Thursday, 8 p.m. -- gave birth
Friday, 6 a.m. -- stood for the first time with the assistance of one nurse and two assistants; walked to the bathroom in my hospital room
Friday, 11 a.m. -- stood up again with the same assistants as before; walked to bathroom again
Friday, 1 p.m. -- stood up with the assistance of one person; walked two laps around the Family Centered Care floor
Friday, 4 p.m. -- stood up by myself and walked around my room
Friday, 6 p.m. -- once my urinary catheter was removed it became rather necessary for me to (somewhat quickly) get out of bed on my own, so I did and from that moment forward I was up and about
Saturday, 9:30 a.m. -- finally got to visit Natalie in the NICU, and Matt wheeled me down in a chair
Saturday, 12 p.m. -- again wheeled to the NICU
Saturday, 3 p.m. -- walked to the NICU; after this brought the wheelchair along in case I needed it, but only wound up using it a couple of trips because of intense leg swelling (see below)
Monday, 8 p.m. -- arrived home after the doctors cautioned me against walking up and down more than one flight of stairs in a day and walked up one flight of stairs (we live in a three-story townhouse). Did not walk up second flight of stairs to bedroom until bed time.
Tuesday, 11 a.m. -- stayed upstairs until it was time to head to the NICU to visit Natalie
Tuesday, 7 p.m. -- after returning home from the NICU for the day I decide, screw it, I am walking up and down stairs because I feel fine

Swelling
I was really fortunate to never have any swelling in my hands and face during pregnancy, and except for about four days of my late pregnancy I hardly experienced any foot or ankle swelling either.

This good fortunate wore off by day 3 postpartum. I noticed swelling right after I gave birth, but frankly based on the stories I'd heard I expected it to be way worse thanks to all the saline solution coursing through my body. It all caught up with me, though, by Sunday. Three days after giving birth I had to struggle to pull my legs out of bed, and I could not fit into any shoes except the cheap flip flops I brought to wear in the shower. (Preview of hospital-bag-packing post, a retrospective: pack flip flops no matter what season! They may be the only shoes you can wear.) I called this my Nutty Professor moment. My feet literally looked like they had been inflated like a balloon, and if all the pants I'd been wearing hadn't been maybe off loose yoga-pant material I would have surely busted a lot of seams.

Thankfully, one week postpartum I had no more swelling. In fact, when I could see my ankle bones, I told Matt my ankles looked anorexic. He said that's just what ankles look like. I had apparently forgotten. So, turns out I did have some ankle swelling basically all throughout my pregnancy, but it happened so gradually and rarely got out of hand (minus a few painful days) that I hardly perceived it was happening.

Weight
OK, this is where I get to brag. My mother always said that when she gave birth to my brother she left the hospital weighing exactly what she weighed before she got pregnant. I really did not believe her. (I still find it debatable, but I don't know why she'd make this up, either.) But, to her credit, back in the 1970s hospital stays were significantly longer, so she does have that on her side.

Well, prophecy was in fact fulfilled for me. Not only did my mother tell me I'd be back in my old body in no time (she has to say this, though, seeing as she bore me) but all the nurses in my doctor's office would make this remark at every single appointment.

Here's my weight loss timeline:

Pre-pregnancy weight: 119 lbs.
Weight upon checking into the hospital: 149 lbs. (at one point I reached 152 lbs. toward the end of my pregnancy, but in the final week of pregnancy I lost 3 lbs., which is apparently a fairly common phenomenon)
Weight upon leaving the hospital Monday, Jan. 16 (4 days postpartum): 139 lbs. I found this at the time discouraging. This 10-lbs. loss was simply baby (8 lbs.) and placenta, I assumed.
Weight on Thursday, Jan. 19 (7 days postpartum): 133 lbs.
Weight on Friday, Jan. 20 (8 days postpartum, 15 hours after bringing Natalie home): 128 lbs.
Weight on Sunday, Jan. 22 (10 days postpartum, 3 days after bringing Natalie home): 121 lbs.
Weight on Tuesday, Jan. 24 (12 days postpartum): 118 lbs. (1 lb. less than my pre-pregnancy weight)

Here's what I can say: breastfeeding is for real. I am so fortunate that so far breastfeeding has been working perfectly. As a result I am burning calories like crazy (apparently 500 a day?!) and eating a ton (having third helpings of some dinner items...I never have seconds, let alone thirds) and shrinking that uterus down to size. I still have a little bit of extra flesh around my stomach, but I assume that will either go away once my uterus is back to normal and/or I get the OK to go back to my exercise routine which includes my Core Fusion Body Sculpt DVD.

9 weeks pregnant, hello flat stomach club!, still at 119 lbs. (and still using a crappy camera lens)

41 weeks pregnant, last pregnancy photo, 149 lbs.

Today, two weeks postpartum and 118 lbs., back in my old jeans (the kind that zip and button! The glory!) and you know, holding a baby!

Right now my stomach looks about as big as it did when I was 12 weeks pregnant, and I can totally handle that (in fact, I am shocked this has occurred so quickly, but again: breastfeeding!).

Incision care
For the first week postpartum I was feeling some pain on the left-hand side of my scar. Pain meds definitely masked that pain, and now I feel no pain there at all.

My nurses in the hospital told me that I did not need to directly clean my incision but instead simply allow the soap I'm using to wash the rest of my body to trickle over the wound. They also told me to use a separate towel or wash cloth to pat dry the incision area to avoid any cross contamination.

The doctors put about 12 pieces of heavy-duty medical tape over my stitches. The nurses at the hospital said I could pull the tape off after having it on for only two days. I said it wasn't bothering me so I'd rather not bother it. The nurse at my own doctor's office advised me to keep the tape on until it started peeling away on its own. That moment arrived yesterday, and I was happy to remove the last piece of barely-sticky-anymore tape.

Now I can have a good look at my scar, it's not as bad as I thought it would be. First of all, in keeping with my doctor's promise to me as I whimpered on the operating room table, it is LOW. No one will be seeing this puppy, even if I wore a really skimpy bikini (which is not my style, and I have a big butt, thus sizing me out of the skimpy-bikini-bottom market). Second of all, it is not as big as I thought. It's about three inches long. It is, however, raised, and I wonder (as someone who's never had stitches) if the raised nature of the scar will diminish or if this will simply be the scar I can tell stories about during future icebreaker activities (I kid).

Pain management
I was instructed by most of my nurses to try not to take too much Percocet because it causes constipation (see below). So, after one week postpartum I had completely weened myself off Percocet. I've been taking some prescription-strength Motrin here and there for the past week, which mostly helps me manage some lower-back pain which appears to be leftover from my epidural. So, in terms of c-section-induced pain, I would say it has been very manageable and way better than I would have ever thought. In fact, I could possibly have been in more pain if I had completed a vaginal delivery. (The irony, I know.)

Bleeding
I knew that with a c-section women still experience heavy-period-like bleeding, but that the bleeding is typically less than what women experience after a vaginal delivery. Though I am sure this is all relative, I would say this is another statement that has held true to my experience. Now, two weeks postpartum I have minimal bleeding, and even since day 1 postpartum it really hasn't been that bad.

Bowels
All my friends who delivered vaginally have told stories over glasses of wine about their first attempts at postpartum bowel movements. One described it as worse than giving birth. One didn't have one until 12 days postpartum. One said she kept rehashing through her mind the following statement while sitting on the toilet, "I have no idea how this is going to come out of me."

Well, again, here I am probably lucky that I did not have a complete vaginal delivery because this has not been the case for me. Yes, I had the irrational fear of somehow breaking through five layers of stitches at the site of my c-section incision, but clearly that did not happen. In the words of our Childbirth Express nurse: when offered stool softeners at the hospital, take them; when offered a suppository at the hospital, embrace it.

If this all seems like TMI, let me assure you that after you lose all your dignity carting around your own urine in a bag attached to your IV pole in the hospital, the function of your bowels and your baby's bowels will be one of your top priorities and you will not care who witnesses you taking care of business. In fact, most of the abdominal pain I was experiencing in days 1 and 2 postpartum magically disappeared after my nurses helped me get to the bathroom.

What did I leave out? If you've had a c-section, what do you recall as the best and the worst or biggest surprises of the recovery process?

First parenthood-inspired organizational blunder

2012-01-25T13:55:00.000-05:00

I have a whole host of blog posts in the works on topics such as what to take to the hospital (in retrospect), c-section recovery, NICU culture and blessings in disguise, gear to have on hand for a newborn, etc., but for now I'll interrupt my "regularly scheduled post" to share this little gem.

The long and short of it is that for the basically the first time in my life I missed a deadline. Specifically, my car is up for its state inspection every December, and this year's inspection just happened to take place on Jan. 24 (this Monday). Whoops.

The best part of the story is that I did not even realize (nor did Matt, for what it's worth) that my car was well overdue for its inspection until we took it to a repair shop on Monday. You may recall that there is only one place in my 2003 Mazda Protege where our daughter's car seat will fit -- that would be directly behind the front passenger's seat. Unfortunately, this is also adjacent to the only door in the car in which the power lock is broken. After taking about two car rides as a family we decided enough is enough, we'd have to suck it up and pay the $250 to have the door taken apart and the power lock fixed. (Fortunately, this was $200 cheaper than the estimate we'd been given at our usual auto-repair shop, so we drove across town to the cheaper repair shop, newborn in tow.)

Of course, when you drop off your car for any maintenance, the repair people inevitably have about 20 other items they find that you could fix. In my case, the fact that they caught that I needed a state inspection was legitimately important. The fact that my car would not have passed the inspection due to nearly dead brakes was also slightly important. And the fact that I legitimately needed maintenance such as a transmission fluid flush also ranks up there on the importantness scale. Matt and I plan to keep my car alive for as long as possible, so we're viewing routine maintenance as rather critical. His car (a two-door) will be the one to go when it's time to upgrade.

So, $900 worth of car repairs four days after bringing our newborn home from the hospital wasn't what we'd bargained for, but I suppose that's just what happens sometimes.

And now, of course, inside our house the basement door is having trouble locking and unlocking thanks to the cold weather, and two of the toilets in our house that have never caused us problems in five years are starting to run whenever they gosh darn feel like it. It's amazing that none of these things happened when I was waiting for Natalie to arrive.

iBaby Log app: iLove You

2012-01-23T11:16:00.000-05:00

There have been quite a few baby items that we've really come to rely on already in these first 100 hours or so that Natalie has been home with us from the NICU. By far the most important one -- OK, besides Pampers Swaddlers in size one and well, frankly, my own boobs -- is the iBaby Log app for the iPhone. Best part? It's free!

This app allows you to set up your basic information about each of your children...

...and then start tracking information in 18 categories:

sleep -- starts tracking as soon as she goes to sleep, or if you forget you can go back and enter the nap's start time.
diaper change -- allows you to enter whether diaper was wet, dirty, or both, and write comments about what you discover in the diaper more specifically (this sounds insane, but once you have a newborn you start to become quite interested in the consistency of the items that come out of their little behinds).
nursing -- track which breast you start a feeding with as well as how long the baby nurses on each side. You can pause the feeding, which is especially useful if you baby is like ours and needs to be burped frequently during a feeding.
bottle feeding -- we are fortunate that Natalie was nursed both by bottle and breast in the NICU, so at 11 days old she is taking bottles just fine (what a blessing in disguise from her NICU time!)
solids -- not for a while!
pumping -- useful to know as I attempt to stock a freezer supply. Fresh breast milk is OK iin the fridge for 24 hours; frozen breast milk is good for up to 3 months in storage.
to do list -- not really sure about this one. I still keep a running to-do list on a pad of paper on our kitchen island.
activity -- probably cool for things like "tummy time" (i.e. putting your child on his stomach for a short period of time to help him develop neck muscles). All the NICU nurses commented that Natalie has impressive neck control for a newborn, which I would attribute to the fact that she was placed on her stomach in the NICU incubators while under the bilirubin lights for her jaundice treatment.
mood -- I am not really sure on this one...haven't felt the urge to track...yet. Her moods appear to be awake and quiet or asleep and quiet.
baths -- guess who's getting her first at-home sponge bath tonight? At least we got a practice round in the NICU.
medication
temperature
sickness -- Not looking forward to using this one.
diary -- I'll use my paper and pen journal, but this one could work, too.
milestone
Dr. visit -- Natalie had her first doctor's appointment Friday morning, after having been home all of 16 hours. When the doctor asked us about her habits and patterns, we said they were good based on our 16 hours of parenting experience. Good news: as of Friday's appointment she'd only gone down 6% from her birth weight. It is normal for newborns to lose 10% of their birth weight in the first couple of weeks. So, she is right on track.
vaccination -- Also not looking forward to this one. There is a room in our pediatrician's office named "the shot room." Literally. It says that on the outside of the room on a plaque. I am sure this does not win over the little ones who can read.
growth -- Natalie was born at 65 percentile for everything -- length (20 in), weight (8 lbs., 1 oz.) and head circumference.

At this point, we've been using the sleep, diaper change and nursing categories the most. This means that I constantly have my phone on me (though I may not answer because I'm occupied with some baby duty).

It's great to start a nursing session and know when she last fed. Because she's supposed to be fed "on demand" for the time being (i.e. whenever she shows signs of hunger, mostly by crying and bringing her clinched fist to her mouth) we need to know how often she's feeding. She can't go more than four hours from the start of one feeding to the start of another feeding, doctor's orders to keep her on the right growth track. In other words, if she started one feeding at 11 a.m., even if the feeding lasted 45 minutes, she'd need to be awake and ready to feed no later than 3 p.m. Normally this is not a problem as she wakes up typically about 3 hours from the previous feeding. Also, for some perspective, sometimes babies eat every hour. This means if you start a feeding at 11 a.m. and the baby eats until 11:30 a.m., one hour later is actually 12 p.m., not 12:30 p.m. If it sounds exhausting, it is, and thankfully I've only had one 1-hour feeding in the time we've had her home. Otherwise she loves the 3-hour feedings.

It's also helpful in the middle of the night to press the "sleep" button and know when she finally went to sleep between feedings. Because without this app we would have no clue when she fell and asleep and subsequently we fell asleep. For example, her first two nights home she barely ever slept more than one hour at a time. Saturday night and last night she slept 3 or 3.5 hours at a time between each feeding, which was incredible. Matt and I each are logging 7-8 hours of interrupted sleep these past two nights. It feels amazingly luxurious. Matt gets up for diaper changes, then hands Natalie to me for breast feeding. Matt did one bottle feeding last night. So, we're pretty even right now, and it's a nice division of labor.

Finally, especially because our baby had a little early battle with jaundice, we need to know how many wet and dirty diapers she produces a day to know she's getting adequate nourishment. The best way to beat jaundice is to get the baby expelling waste because jaundice has to do with poor liver function, a problem every newborn deals with on some level. Doctors are looking for between 6 and 8 wet diapers a day. Dirty diapers can follow a more loose schedule (bad, unintentional pun). So far she is living up to her potential and I sincerely hope she doesn't back track.

This iBaby Log app is truly outstanding. If you have a baby on the way, I highly recommend downloading it now and playing around with it before the baby arrives. It will take away a lot of the new-parent jitters.

Jail break!

2012-01-19T15:12:00.002-05:00

Little lady got her get out of jail card today at 1:30 p.m. She is home, safe and sound, where she belongs.

Thank you all!

Natalie's labor and delivery story

2012-01-19T09:41:00.000-05:00

Every woman who has been through labor and delivery has an amazing story to tell. Amazing and graphic, no doubt. I am no exception here. I am going to be incredibly frank, so get ready. I think it's useful for all my friends and family who've been asking questions and want to know the gory details. I will give them to you. If you don't want those details, please don't read this post.

My labor and delivery story can be summarized as follows:

1) If it could happen it did happen. Thank god I went in well informed.
2) I am way stronger than I realize. This is my new mantra and one I've already started sharing with my lady friends to encourage them as well.

My labor story really begins Dec. 8 at my 36-week appointment. My doctor performed my first cervical check and discovered that I was already 1 cm dilated and 75% effaced. She was really excited, saying that for a first-time mom this was excellent progress and she was convinced I would go into labor early, or if nothing else I would not go past my due date. She recommended I pack my bags and get everything in order. I started to freak out at work, getting all my grading and planning and packing done in case I wouldn't make it to Dec. 22, the start of my maternity leave.

Well, as you know, I clearly delivered 10 days late and went a little stir crazy at home in the process of waiting for Natalie to show up. By 39 weeks I was 3 cm dilated and 90% effaced. And that's where I stalled out. I had three different non-stress tests at my doctor's office leading up to Natalie's arrival. (If you're unfamiliar, this is a test where the mom is hooked up to two monitors: one for the baby's heart rate and one for the mom's contractions. Natalie took contractions like a champ, showing that she was well-suited for labor. Turns out I was having lots of contractions, some rather intense, that I could not feel. During one somewhat significant contraction at 39 or 40 weeks I told my doctor a story and she said, "Did you not feel that last contraction, because it was rather intense." No, I did not.)

So then I started worrying that I wouldn't know true labor when it finally arrived. I figured this was absolutely ridiculous, but I still worried. Overall, though, my fears of childbirth had subsided and I reached a really Zen state, ready to bring this baby into the world at the time she decided was right.

Then I went in for my 41-week appointment on Tuesday, Jan. 10. My doctor stripped my membranes for the third time. This is barely a procedure. It pretty much involves the doctor digging around the cervix while she's performing the cervical check for dilation. It's just more vigorous digging. Usually doing this procedure once can help some women go into labor within 24-48 hours. Not so much for me! But, good news is that I spent pretty much all day Wednesday having noteworthy contractions and my "bloody show."

By 8 p.m. Wednesday night I told Matt I could no longer focus on watching our Netflixed episodes of session one of Downton Abbey. So, I went upstairs and settled into bed, reading my latest novel selection, Room.

By 10 p.m. I was fast asleep.

Here's where I am going to let the timeline take over:

11 p.m. Wednesday -- I bolt out of bed. I had a huge pregnant stomach, yet I had a strong enough contraction that I actually jumped out of bed. Such a feat had not occurred since approximately August. I attempt to time contractions to no avail. They seem constant.

11:30 p.m. Wednesday -- I call my doctor. The doctor on call is not picking up, so the nurse talks me through my contractions to assess the situation and puts in word for the doctor to call me back asap.

Midnight Thursday -- Still haven't heard from the doctor, and now I am worried I won't make it to the hospital in time.

12:15 a.m. Thursday -- The doctor calls and advises me to get to the hospital. We take our bags to the car, throwing in the few remaining items like our cell phones and iPad. I remember to turn off the computer and turn down the thermostat to 62 degrees.

1 a.m. Thursday -- Arrive at labor and delivery registration. They take me to triage to assess the situation. Another non-stress test reveals I am contracting every 1.5 to 3 minutes. I take this as a good sign, seeing as I'd been advised to come to the hospital when my contractions were 5 minutes apart lasting 1 minute at a time. The baby's heart rate still looks outstanding. The nurse performs a cervical check and discovers that I am still only 3 cm dilated (after nearly a day of noticeable contractions). They give me two options: I can walk around the labor and delivery floor in circles, or I can go ahead and get pictocin (a drug that stimulates contractions...and is known by some to cause contractions to become very painful). I opt for the walking option.

2 a.m. - 5 a.m. Thursday -- Matt and I walk for 3 hours. I hope that when this is over I will have gained at least a couple centimeters dilation. The only contractions that matter are those that lead to dilation. My contractions are definitely feeling more painful, truly like awful period cramps, and I have to pause periodically on the labor and delivery floor and put my head on the guard rails on the walls and swing my hips back and forth.

5 a.m. Thursday -- I am in a bed in the labor and delivery wing and Matt and I are ready to settle into real labor. I stay in bed for a while, hoping I've made progress. I am still at 3 cm. They ask me if I want to start pictocin, and I say not yet, give me one more shot.

6 a.m. Thursday -- Still stuck at 3 cm, so I opt for pitocin. I am told by my nurse that I need to anticipate the pain I'll be in 45 minutes from the time being when I consider requesting an epidural because it takes about 45 minutes to get the anesthesiologist there and to get the epidural inserted. I think this sounds crazy. How can you anticipate pain in the future? But I try to keep it in mind.

7:15 a.m. Thursday -- I decide that while my contractions are manageable now, by 8 a.m. they may not be, so why risk it? I request the epidural.

7:45 a.m. Thursday -- The anesthesiologist arrives and tells me to hold still (as I had heard before) and that the epidural insertion would feel like a bad bee sting. I intentionally never looked at any of the equipment being used so as not to worry. I remained shockingly calm. The nurse gave me a pillow to grip and hunch over and I barely needed her to hold me still. The whole thing only took about 5 minutes to administer, and I felt no pain at all from the epidural insertion. It immediately goes to work. I can feel my legs and move my feet and toes, but I no longer feel any contraction pain. According to what I had been told at our childbirth class, this sounded like the ideal epidural experience.

7:55 a.m. Thursday -- Thank god I got the epidural when I did because my water broke on its own. My doctor told me that my amniotic fluid levels were healthy (aka high) and when my water broke I would know it. Well, I did. People had said it would sound like a ping. It was a little deeper sound than that to me, but when it broke there was a huge gush and I said to the nurses, "I'm pretty sure my water just broke." Good news, the fluid was totally clear. I am so glad I had my epidural when my water broke because I've heard contractions after the water breaks are more intense, and contractions with pitocin are more intense, so contractions with pitocin and broken water with no epidural would have been a recipe for disaster.

The majority of the daylight hours following are anti-climactic. We just waited. I felt no pain. Matt slept. A lot. So much so that when I finally needed him for something I shouted his name 15 times before he woke up. He finished reading his book. I watched the fourth hour of the Today Show. Kathie and Hoda are truly more entertaining that the Saturday Night Live parodies of them. I flipped through some magazines. I even slept a little myself.

11 a.m. Thursday -- Cervical check: 5 cm dilated! The doctor reduces my pictocin because my body is finally laboring well on its own.

3:30 p.m. Thursday -- Cervical check: 9 cm dilated!

4:45 p.m. Thursday -- Cervical check: fully dilated and effaced and ready to push.

5 p.m. Thursday -- just as I am starting to push my contractions slow down to one every five minutes! We cannot believe this. This is when you're supposed to call the hospital initially to come in. When you're ready to push contractions are nearly constant with hardly a break in between. Still, I continue to push as I'm able to. I push well. The secret to pushing? Take a deep breath like you're about to go under water (I used to be a swimmer); lift up your legs by grabbing your thighs (I am flexible); push arch your chin over your stomach and, in my doctor's words, push like you are about to have the biggest bowel movement of your life (thanks to pregnancy side effects, I am good at being constipated). So, the nurse and doctor were impressed with my technique!

5:45 p.m. -- My doctor tries the vacuum extractor since I only need a little help to get the head out. No dice.

7 p.m. Thursday -- Still pushing. Her head is almost out. Every time I push, though, her head goes RIGHT BACK IN. ALL THE WAY. My doctor is confused and starts to look concerned. I am doing everything right. The baby is not too big for my body. Why won't this baby come out? All of a sudden, I look over at my nurse, who has a worried expression on her face. My temperature, which has been a solid 98.6 degrees during the whole labor and delivery process, has spiked to 101.4 degrees. They're worried about possible infection. My doctor says the word c-section. I start to push with everything I have, telling myself I have nearly birthed this baby, I have got to avoid a c-section.

7:20 p.m. Thursday -- A woman in operating room attire comes into the room. My doctor says, "Uh-oh, here comes the Grim Reaper." This is apparently the woman who starts the c-section preparation. My doctor says, "Let's not do that yet. I'm giving her one more chance." I hold my breath like I've never held my breath before. I imagine the baby's head just spilling out. Her head is RIGHT THERE. No dice.

7:30 p.m. Thursday -- My doctor says, "This baby is not coming out. We need to get you prepped for a c-section." I start bawling. Tears are streaming down my face. A team of highly efficient doctors and nurses burst into the room and take over. "Stephanie, this is Dr. Kennedy." "Stephanie, now we're going to do this....and that....and blah blah blah." I felt like I was having an out-of-body experience. All I can do is stare at the ceiling and cry. I do not cry because I have been robbed of a vaginal delivery. I freakin' had a vaginal delivery. I cry for surgery, for the possibility of death, for loss of blood, but mostly for fear of not getting to bond with my baby, for it all being so clinical and depersonalized. Despite it all, I manage to whimper to my doctor, "If you must perform a c-section, please use stitches to sew me back up rather than staples." She agrees. I'm thankful my friend told me to request that.

7:45 p.m. Thursday-- I am in the operating room, laid out like people have pictured Jesus on the cross with my arms spread out and strapped down, staring into the intensely bright lights of the operating room. Matt is not there with me. He's still scrubbing up and putting on OR scrubs. I am just crying.

7:50 p.m. Thursday-- Matt joins me. Since I had an epidural I am already numb, but then the anesthesiologist adds more...something...that numbs you. Whatever. At this point I give up.

right around 8 p.m. Thursday -- I say to Matt, "Our daughter is going to be born during the session premier of 30 Rock." At least I have a sense of humor as I am being ripped open. The doctors say I might feel some "pressure." I've watched enough episodes of A Baby Story of TLC to know this line. In all c-sections, right before they take the baby out they reference "pressure." Well, at that moment, it felt like a Sumo wrestler was jumping on my upper ribs. All during labor and delivery I remained virtually silent to the point that my doctor and nurse called me a trooper and said they wished all their patients were as calm as me during the whole process. The "pressure" moment, though, is when I lost it. The Sumo wrestler jumped on my ribs three times. I screamed out three times. Right after my third scream...

8:03 p.m. Thursday-- I screamed, then she screamed, and out Natalie emerged into the world. Matt and I immediately started sobbing. The tone of my cries immediately changed. All the pain was gone. People were talking to me, but I was just staring off into the corner of the operating room, watching Matt take the first photos of our daughter while the nurse cleaned her off and performed her Apgar tests (which she passed with flying colors!).

My doctor says, "There was no way that baby was coming out. The cord was around her neck twice. And she was lodged underneath your ribs" (which explains the Sumo-wrestler sensation and my last-minute yelling).

The nurse asks Matt if he would like to cut the cord. At first he says, "Sure," and then immediately says, "You know what, I am bad with scissors, why don't you do it?"

8:15 p.m. Thursday -- Natalie is all cleaned off and they bring her to me so I can kiss her. I am shivering despite having warm blankets all over me, but I am distracted by my daughter. Then she and Matt are taken away to the c-section recovery room and I am left to be put back together.

After they take Natalie and Matt away I ask, "When can I have some water? When can I have something to eat?" It has now been over 24 hours since I had food and 20 hours since I had anything to drink.

8:45 p.m. Thursday-- I am finally being wheeled into the recovery room, and I finally get to really be with my daughter and my husband. The nurse asks me if I have any sensation in my legs. Immediately I move my knees and wiggle my toes. "Wow," they say, "That was fast! We were going to see if you could just wiggle a toe." Matt calls his parents and I call mine to share our happy news. Then we call our siblings. Finally I email my best friends. Then later on we send out our bbc'ed email to the rest of the world announcing Natalie's arrival.

9 p.m. -- Once the nurses are done attending to Natalie they place her on top of me. My shivering stops. I look like the Bride of Frankenstein, but I am totally calm and content and with my daughter. Then they unwrap her and unwrap me and place us skin to skin. I feel her kicking on top of my stomach, and it feels exactly like it felt when she was in the womb.

As they are taking her away from me so we can get ready for transfer to our room upstairs, I notice that Natalie is breathing like a pug and is turning more red. I ask the nurses, "Is she going to the NICU? She doesn't seem right." The nurses say, "That baby? No, that baby is perfectly healthy. Not going to the NICU."

10 p.m. -- We are up in our room in the Family Centered Care unit where we'll be staying until we're discharged from the hospital. I remember how it felt painful as I was being moved from the transfer bed to my bed in my room. Being lifted after having just had major surgery does not feel good. But Natalie is there in a bassinet, so everything is fine. And they let me drink water! Sweet, glorious water. It never tasted so good.

11 p.m. -- Natalie and I breastfeed for 35 minutes. She is a champ.

12:30 a.m. Friday -- Nurses come into my room to check on Natalie. Something isn't right. They say they are going to go assess her, so they wheel her away.

1 a.m. Friday -- Natalie is whisked away to the NICU. She has fluid in her lungs (aka pneumonia). She swallowed my amniotic fluid. Because my water broke on its own 12 hours before I gave birth the risk of infection that always comes along with water breaking came to fruition when my temperature spiked. If she had been born vaginally the bad fluids would have been squeezed out of her and she probably wouldn't have pneumonia and probably wouldn't be in the NICU. So, for all intents and purposes, my c-section sent Natalie to the NICU.

At this moment, though, 1 a.m. on Friday, after having basically been awake since 8 a.m. on Wednesday I am a rag of a woman, so the severity of what is happening hasn't really set in with me. I somehow manage to sleep a little under the stupor of Percocet and heavy-duty ibuprofen.

5:30 a.m. Friday -- My amazing nurse Lauren wakes me up to use the breast pump because I want to breast feed but can't since my daughter is in the NICU. We manage to get out a lot of colostrum (the milk moms have before the real milk comes in 3-5 days after delivery), which is great. Lauren explains to me that because I have a fever and because my daughter is in the NICU I can't see her until my fever has been gone for 24 hours. I'm on antibiotics for infection as well.

All day Friday we have visitors, and all of them get to travel down to the NICU to see Natalie while I am stuck in the upstairs recovery room. The baby I have had in my belly for 10 months is now away from me and with others. It all seems highly unfair.

I finally get to see her Saturday at 9:30 a.m. Once I could start visiting her, Matt and I were in the NICU every three hours for her scheduled feedings.

She is still as of this writing in the NICU and has been in the NICU ever since she arrived there Friday, January 13 at 1 a.m. (I just realized she went in on Friday the 13th...superstitious, anyone?). My initial hospital discharge date was going to be Sunday, Jan. 15. Sunday at 1:30 a.m. we were with Natalie in the NICU and got to talk to a doctor. We had initially been told she might be discharged with us. But Sunday at 1:30 a.m. we found out she'd be staying until at least Thursday (today). Our hearts broke. Matt wheeled me back to our hospital room and we just broke down. At 3 a.m. my nurse came in to take my blood pressure and it went through the roof. I was at heart attack levels. My blood work all came back normal, though, indicating that my suddenly high blood pressure (I've never had high blood pressure in my life) was the result of anxiety over leaving our daughter.

Thankfully, because my blood pressure spiked to intense levels, I earned myself an extra free night in the hospital. My doctor said it was for the best. I agreed.

My new discharge date and time was Monday, Jan. 17 at 7 p.m. Matt and I went to the NICU on Monday for Natalie's 6 p.m. scheduled feeding. We snuggled her and bundled her back up and put her back in her incubator. We left the hospital with an empty car seat and empty hearts.

Tuesday and Wednesday we spent the majority of the day at the NICU, visiting her every three hours for her feedings. When she's not feeding, though, she really needs to be in the incubator under the bilirubin lights. So, as much as we want to keep her out and snuggle, we know she needs her treatment.

She did in fact have pneumonia which she is cured of now, but she needed a week's worth of antibiotics to make sure she was fully healed. She also had jaundice. They were proactive and put her under the bilirubin lights Saturday morning before her jaundice got any worse. While in her incubator under the blue lights, wearing her baby sunglasses we dubbed her "the baby of the future."

Yesterday (Wednesday) at 9 a.m. Matt turned off the bilirubin lights for the last time.

Here's Natalie in her bassinet yesterday! Free from the incubator! Looking like a normal baby.

She is also on an IV to get extra fluids in her body to get the jaundice out. Despite all the odds against us, we are breastfeeding (albeit in front of everyone in the NICU, with sirens going off every minute from various baby's machines and Natalie's IV and other cords in the way). The nurses are supplementing with my milk that we bring to them that I am pumping (rented a hospital pump....not buying our own heavy-duty pump was a great decision because renting the hospital one is a better deal for us and it's super efficient). They are also supplementing with formula.

Now that Natalie appears to be just about recovered, we are hopeful that today will be her official discharge day. Please keep us in your thoughts today, and I'll update on her status.

(And if you haven't yet had children, I hope this doesn't scare you off. You really should have babies if you want them. They're pretty awesome.)

Natalie Anna's first photos

2012-01-16T20:12:00.000-05:00

Here are some I couldn't post yesterday

Drumroll please....

2012-01-15T23:14:00.000-05:00

"Holey moley me oh my
You're the apple of my eye
Girl I've never loved one like you"
-"Home" by Edward Sharpe & The Magnetic Zeroes

Matt and I are thrilled to announce the arrival of our baby girl.

Born Thursday, January 12, 2012 at 8:03 p.m.

Weighing in at 8 pounds, 1 ounce

20 solid inches long

Full head of dark hair, long eyelashes, long fingernails. She has her dad's cheeks.

Welcome to the world, Natalie Anna Axelrod!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We have decided "Home" is our song for her. We loved it the moment we heard it for the first time, but now it holds really special meaning for us. (Yes, there is foreshadowing in that.) We are going to require her to dance with her father to this song at her wedding. That is the only non-negotiable requirement we have for her future.

I will share detail -- there is much much much detail than we could have imagined -- as soon as circumstances present themselves. I will also post painstakingly adorable photos when those same circumstances arise. Right now, though, we celebrate new life.

"Ahhh home
Let me come home
Home is wherever I'm with you
...
Baby I'm coming home."

A pictorial pregnancy timeline

2012-01-14T12:15:00.002-05:00

5 (almost 6) weeks pregnant, May 7, 2011, waiting for first doctor's appointment; in the meantime, enjoying our little secret at a friend's wedding

9 weeks pregnant

10 weeks -- At the time, I think I'm starting to show. Hahaha. How silly.

11 weeks

12 weeks -- the tiniest bit of definition begins

13 weeks -- solidly in the second trimester, I start to have a more legitimately rounded stomach.

15 weeks -- hiking on Catalina Island in Los Angeles

16 and 17 weeks -- in Buenos Aires, Argentina

19 weeks

20 weeks -- August 15, 2011, one day before turning 30. And, we found out that day it's a girl!

21 weeks -- This is when I think I "popped."

22 weeks -- Maternity clothes start to look normal on me. And, it's back to work for a new school year.

24 weeks -- The beginning of "is that a small soccer ball attached to your stomach, or are you legitimately pregnant?"

25 weeks -- Hiking the black diamond in Deer Valley, Utah at a friend's wedding.

27 weeks -- Can't touch this.

29 weeks -- Back at U.Va for a football game and an important onesie.

30 weeks

31 weeks

32 weeks

34 weeks -- Heading to Thanksgiving dinner!

35 weeks -- Belly button is officially an outie.

37 weeks -- Officially full term! Thought I could deliver any minute. How silly.

38 weeks -- Home from the shower my newspaper students threw for us.

40 weeks -- Thought this had to be the last weekly shot of my pregnancy. How silly.

41 weeks -- January 11, 2012. Done.

Total weight gain: 30 pounds
Belly button definitely out in the home stretch
No stretch marks! I did not use any lotion on my stomach either.
Only a few days of ankle swelling.
Shockingly few, if any, spider veins.
Thank you, genetic code.

The art of the thank-you note

2012-01-12T11:04:00.001-05:00

As I've said before, Matt and I have so much to be grateful for in regard to Baby Awesomerod. The first is simply the fact that she was conceived. The second is the fact that I've had a relatively easy and complication-free pregnancy. The third is that throughout this process we've been surrounded by generous friends and family who have thrown us multiple showers (parts 1 and 2) and given us lots and lots of amazing physical gifts (in addition to the comfort of their presence right down to these final countdown weeks).

I am a firm believer in expressing gratitude. I think this is best done in written form, preferably in the form of a handwritten thank-you note, though there are plenty of times when a nice email does the trick as well. When someone does something awesome for us it's the least we can do to send a nice note saying how thankful we are for what they did and for our relationship with them in general.

Here's my miniature thank-you note station that I keep in our desk with stamps readily available to reduce the chances of procrastinating on note writing because supplies aren't handy.

To toot my own horn (why do we say "not to toot my own horn" when that's obviously what we're doing?), on more than one occasion I've been told I have mad thank-you note writing skills. Although I do not consider this to be a particularly impressive skill, I think this came from years of training at the hands of my mother, who is a huge proponent of handwritten thank-you notes. Here's what I've learned.

First of all, a good thank you note needs to be timely.

I know everyone has these Emily Post-esque timelines they could follow that give us all some leeway and allow for several months to pass before a note must be sent, but I always think the sooner, the better. As a gift giver if I get a note in the mail months after sending a gift I'm usually like, "Wait, what did I give you? When? I forgot." Everyone likes more immediate feedback. Of course, when life gets in the way of giving timely feedback, "better late than never" is still the best policy.

Second of all, and perhaps most importantly, a good thank-you note needs to be personal.

This can be achieved by:

1) Specifically mentioning the gift(s) received along with some explanation of why they're great. When the gift is money I think it's always best to give some hints as to how the money will be used.

2) Specifically mentioning something about the occasion being celebrated -- wedding, baby, birthday, new home, etc. Reveal something about yourself. Where are you with wedding planning? Baby prep? Home renovations?

3) Specifically mentioning something personal about the person to whom you're writing. How does he/she fit in with this celebration?

Third of all, a good thank-you note should be of reasonable length.

A couple sentences just doesn't cut it once you're older than a third grader. Most greeting cards allow space for two or three paragraphs of text, and I like to use the space given to me.

Of course, the most important rule of thank-you note writing is that you actually write the note.

Almost everyone writes notes for wedding and baby gifts, but I'm always shocked by how, for example, few students write thank-you notes for college letters of recommendation. Those suckers are not easy to churn out and are frankly something most teachers I know dislike doing. Perhaps if more than a handful of students each year would actually send a follow-up email or handwritten note to their teachers there would be fewer of us begrudging the task. (Steps off soap box...)

Do you have any other thank-you note how-to tips? What other ways do you express gratitude?

Recipe tip: Asparagus, goat cheese and lemon pasta

2012-01-11T09:37:00.001-05:00

When you live in the world of "any minute there could be a baby!" you really change your grocery shopping list. We've been taking a one-day-at-a-time approach to meal planning for a while now, and in the process I've been looking for recipes that are non-spoilage-friendly lest this baby actually decide to enter the world when we have a few items stocked in our fridge.

That's why I was really pleased to see this asparagus, goat cheese and lemon pasta recipe linked to through Kate's latest recipe post on Elefantitas Alegres. For what it's worth, she got this recipe from Smitten Kitchen. Follow the Smitten Kitchen link for the complete details. So, this is like a repost of a repost. But at least it's worth it.

I chose this recipe for Monday night's dinner because of its ingredients. I love goat cheese, lemon and asparagus, though lately roasted asparagus by itself -- the way we've been eating it for years -- has felt a bit boring. Drenching it in goat cheese and lemon and surrounding it in whole-wheat pasta is the way to go.

Besides using whole-wheat pasta, which is the only type we eat, we made a couple other simple adjustments to the Smitten Kitchen way of doing things. Because our grocery store was out of fresh tarragon and I didn't want to buy a $5 jar of an herb we hardly ever use, I opted for a pre-herbed goat cheese to add some flavor. Like Kate, we roasted the asparagus, since that's how we like it. Also like Kate, I planned to add some cherry tomatoes to the dish, but at the last minute forgot to remind Matt to add it in (and didn't want to chop up anything else while we prepared to watch Downton Abbey).

I have a feeling this recipe is going to follow us into the early-infant-care-days as well.

New addition

2012-01-10T15:37:00.000-05:00

...DJ Roomba!

Matt's contribution to nesting around our house consists of him having purchased a Roomba Pet Series 562 from a woman on Craigslist (who also happens to be very pregnant and believes the Roomba is going to be too loud for her incoming baby....except it's way, way less noisy than our Dyson, so whatevs people. Her decision to sell it second hand saved us over $200 off the full purchase price.). We are currently testing it out. It is working its magic on our main level (living room, kitchen and dining room). Like everything we bring into our house, it is already nicely covered in dog hair.

The dogs do not know how to respond to it. Hopefully chasing it around will keep them occupied enough to ignore our daughter when and if she ever arrives on this planet.

And when we have a party, we can assure you DJ Roomba will play a major role in the festivities.

DJ ROOMBA - watch more funny videos

Baby class 3: Infant care

2012-01-09T11:20:00.000-05:00

Before I write a legitimate post (as opposed to the classic lists of crap I've been doing to fill time this past week) I'll just say that I am still very much pregnant and officially at 41 weeks as of today. Woo. Hoo.

A friend of mine who is far away from having kids asked me last week if I have a baby manual, or, better yet, a baby cheat sheet. Then I realized that I never blogged about our experiences nearly two months ago at an infant care class we attended. (I already told you about our baby-ready dogs class and our childbirth express class.) This two-hour infant care class is one of four prenatal classes offered for free through Kaiser Permanente insurance. As a result of this infant care class I can answer in the affirmative that yes, we do in fact have a baby cheat sheet. It's really meant to get us through the first two weeks of life, which I hear (and can imagine) are probably the scariest, the ones when you're "waiting for the real parents to show up" as apparently more than one couple I know has been heard to say shortly after the birth of their first born.

Throughout my pregnancy I've been recording notes from baby classes, baby to-do lists, and questions to ask my doctor at each appointment in my little Vera Bradley notebook my mother-in-law gave me a few years ago.

Inside this little notebook I filled two pages with My First Two Weeks of Life Baby Care Cheat Sheet courtesy of the infant care class.

It goes something like this:

Feeding advice for first two weeks

Keep track of feedings. I plan to use the free iBabyLog app on my iPhone. (After I've had some time to test this app out I'll write a post reporting back on whether I like it or not.)
8-12 feedings per day
Smacking lips is a classic sign that the baby needs to feed
Breastfeeding:

If breastfeeding works, can expect 10-20 minutes that the baby will spend at each breast during a feeding
Best breastfeeding position is at a slight incline
If possible, avoid giving the infant a pacifier for the first two weeks

Bottle feeding

Hold bottle at a more horizontal incline using a low-flow nipple. Switch sides on which you hold the baby halfway through (mimicking breastfeeding)
Burp baby after each ounce

To prevent gas prop baby up for 15 minutes following a feeding

Diaper advice during the first two weeks

Keep track of diaper changes. Again, I can do this using the iBabyLog app.
Days 1-2: 1-2 wet diapers, 1-2 dirty diapers per day
Days 3-4: 3-5 wet diapers, 3-4 dirty diapers per day (The general rule of thumb the nurse gave us is that after the first couple days we can expect to change, on average, 7 diapers per day.)
Day 5 through six weeks: 6-8 wet diapers, 3-6 dirty diapers per day
Normal newborn poop is the size of a baby's palm

Sleep advice during the first two weeks

The first three days the baby should not sleep more than 3 hours at a time
After the first one to two weeks the baby may not need to be woken up for feedings (though he/she should be woken up during the first 2-3 days)
Newborns sleep approximately 16-18 hours per day (This is why this stage is called the "honeymoon period" by some and why some friends of mine who've been through this have remarked that they had way more time on their hands than they thought they would during the first two weeks of their baby's life.)

Health advice during the first two weeks

Request skin-to-skin contact between baby and mom immediately after birth -- the newborn evaluations can wait for a few minutes (when the birth circumstances are considered "normal")
2-3 baths per week; give sponge baths until the umbilical cord stump falls off
Umbilical cord stump only needs to be cleaned with cotton balls and perhaps water; rubbing alcohol is not necessary
The umbilical cord stump may bleed and that is normal. A teaspoon or more of blood, however, is not normal and warrants a call to the doctor.
A loss of 10 percent or more of the birth weight during the first two weeks is normal.
It's standard practice for a newborn to be seen by a pediatric nurse or doctor 1-2 days after hospital discharge and again at a 2-week-old appointment.
The most accurate temperature readings are taken rectally. A rectal temperature of 100.4 or higher is a major concern. During the first two months it is essential for a medical professional to see any baby with an elevated temperature.

I know there are millions of ways to care for an infant and raise a child. I'm curious to hear from the parents out there: What from this list did you find to be true to your experience? What did you find was different from your experience? What is missing from the list that you would add? I will probably have several more days to absorb your wisdom :)

Totally stealing this...

2012-01-07T16:10:00.000-05:00

...from a friend's Facebook page. Her due date is today, and her friend suggested she might need this link soon. I need it now:

http://www.haveyouhadthatbabyyet.com/

40 weeks and 3 & 4 days pregnant

2012-01-06T17:41:00.000-05:00

What do you do when you're 3 and 4 days past your due date?

You clean the ceiling fans.

You dust off the top of the refrigerator.

You redust the house, because the extensive cleaning you did two weeks ago is now null and void and you have a dusty house again.

You wash all the sheets and towels.

You give the house the most thorough vacuuming it has ever gotten.

You pick up the extensive trash that has blown all around your row of townhouses thanks to the negligence of the neighbors who live two houses down and whom you've dubbed the dirty, crappy neighbors.

You repaint your nails because the manicure you got with your friend a week ago is no longer looking so hot, even though your nails themselves are still pretty fabulous.

You start to harness the power of Netflix again and watch The Business of Being Born, Cedar Rapids and Super 8.

You go back to finishing up State of Wonder, a book you started many months ago but could never manage to stay up to read at night when you were working.

You try to organize a year's worth of recipes from Everyday Food into your recipe notebook. You didn't keep up with it this year because the January to April editions came to you during your gluten-free period, the May through July issues came when you were not particularly interested in food, and the August through December issues came when you were not exactly in a stage of life to be organizing and trying out new recipes. And, as it turns out, the Everyday Food fairy has struck again and you are about to get another year's worth of this magazine from some unknown source. (Come out, wherever you are!)

As you plan for the week ahead, you no longer say, "If there's no baby by then, then..." in response to every social invitation and instead say, "I will see you then!"

You are grateful for the return of warm weather (over 60 degrees on January 6!) so you take four long walks in two days. You are also grateful for the friends and family who accompany you on these long walks. When you're not walking or cleaning or sitting, you dance around the house some and discover that your baby especially likes "Empire State of Mind."

You are also grateful for your friend who is free for two hours on a Thursday morning and can meet you down the street for an extended coffee session.

Finally, you're grateful for your team of girlfriends you've dubbed the First Responders who send you a constant stream of amusing one-liners and ridiculous finds from the internet to keep you amused.

40 weeks and 2 days pregnant

2012-01-04T14:50:00.000-05:00

What do you do when you're 40 weeks and 2 days pregnant?

You wake up at 6 a.m. but then take a three hour nap.

You buy some red fabric and some curtain hooks and finally make those no-sew curtains for the master bedroom that you've been talking about for the past year. The woman who cuts your fabric drops some on the ground and asks you to pick it up. You say, "No, I can't." Then she sees your belly and asks when you're due. You say two days ago. She hears two years ago. You think it's all about right.

You pick up some extra thread, too, and sew that button on your husband's jacket that's needed repair for two years. (Of course, you have to look up how to sew a button in your Home Comforts book because although you've done this before you've never been particularly good at these things.)

You buy your husband some more long athletic pants at Target, anticipating him being home during his paternity leave needing something warm to wear on the bottom half of his body. He keeps getting cold at night and tries to snuggle up to you. But at this point you just need your physical space.

You field emails and phone calls from friends and family who fear you've had the baby and just not told them. "No worries," you say, "I promise you'll find out when she arrives. You're already bbc'ed to the group email that will go out after her birth." Sit tight, it might not be for a while.

40 weeks and 1 day pregnant nesting

2012-01-03T15:05:00.000-05:00

What do you do when you're 40 weeks and 1 day pregnant? Your husband is back at work, even though you didn't think he'd be back following winter break, and the rest of the world is back to post-holidays reality as well.

Your house has been clean for the past two weeks because you gave it an insanely thorough cleaning, thinking this was the last time you'd do that for a while. You don't need to put your feet up and relax because you've been doing that for almost two weeks as well.

So, you scrub the base boards.

And wash all the windows.

You take all the knobs off your kitchen cabinets and remove the last remnants of plastic that must have covered the cabinets when they were first installed a decade ago. It's something that's been bothering you for the past five years. (Look closely below to see what I mean!)

You Magic Erase the white cabinets in your kitchen.

Then you Magic Erase all the outlet covers and light switch plates. If you go much further you'll Magic Erase your whole house.

You take a break for a mid-morning bagel and watch I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant, all the while shaking your head as your overdue baby kicks you repeatedly in the ribs.

You make a diaper caddy for the main level of your house.

And you corral all your camera equipment into one location on the main level, since you figure having everything together will be useful when you get to start some baby photo shoots.

You organize all the toiletries and cleaning products in the hallway bathroom because this will become the baby's bathroom.

Your organize your husband's socks even though you thought that might wait until after the baby's arrival.

You do what you hope is your last round of baby laundry before the baby arrives. This time you wash 6-month size clothing you were initially going to hold off on until after the baby's arrival.

You finish reading the baby sleep habits book that you started two days ago on your new Kindle.

You return to your recipe notebook and finally make a grocery list, something you've been intentionally putting off because each day you think, "This is it! I don't want the food to spoil while we're in the hospital." But you realize that going to restaurants is getting expensive, your empty fridge is looking pathetic, it's probably a safe bet that you'll need several days' worth of food in the house after all, and frankly it's time to make some blue cheese dip. Because WHAT. ELSE. ARE. YOU. DOING? So you go grocery shopping at 1 p.m. on a Tuesday and envision your future existence of shopping with senior citizens and other stay-at-home moms for a while. And that is actually the best part -- no picked-over groceries, no plethora of carts left in the aisles, no long lines at the check out.

And when people ask you when the baby's due, you can finally use the line, "Yesterday," kind of like Amy Poehler in the classic Saturday Night Live sketch "I'm No Angel." (Sorry for the quality -- why can't I find this anywhere else online?)

And despite feeling a little stir crazy after being given by your doctor a month ago what now feels like false hope for an early delivery, you know that the baby has to get here sometime relatively soon.

Actually, you realize at 3:01 p.m. on a Tuesday, you're living the dream.

But the very, very best part of all this, no matter how you slice it, is that for this rare, beautiful moment, at least you do not have a single paper to grade, and for that you could not be more thankful.

New year. New bag. Same attitude.

2012-01-01T18:05:00.000-05:00

A year ago I got an amazing new bag. This bag is extra amazing because it looks as good today as it did when I first got it in the store.

Now as I sit here on the eve of my due date, waiting, I am ready to take my newest bag for its test run.

But we don't need a diaper bag yet, because on the eve of my due date there is still no baby.

This feeds in to my resolution. For the first time in my life I am going to carry over the previous year's resolution to the new year. Last year I resolved to accept the things I cannot change. In case you haven't figured it out, a lot of that resolution was wrapped up in my fertility problems.

Now as I sit here on the eve of my due date, reading a book about baby sleep habits, I think about all the habits I'd like to establish for our baby, all the advice I'd like to follow, and the kind of baby I'd like to have in an ideal world. And I realize, again, there is so much I am going to need to just accept that I cannot change.

Ironically, I keep trying to take really long walks to get this labor show on the road, and I know the baby is just laughing at me. She'll arrive when she's ready. It's her very first act, and it's something I can't control.

The cost of a baby

2011-12-30T09:24:00.001-05:00

Financial concerns are some of the scariest things soon-to-be parents or anyone contemplating having a child in the future must consider. For our entire 5.5 year marriage thus far the cost of babies and children has been at the forefront of all the financial decisions Matt and I have made (so much so that you may recall my financial spreadsheet I made several years ago titled "Can we ever afford kids?", the answer being yes).

You've probably heard stories similar to this one on the Today Show about the lifetime costs associated with raising a child. As this story points out, the average American family spends $250,000 per child over of the course of its financially dependent lifetime. This figure excludes the costs associated with college, and let's be serious, by the time our daughter will be entering college a four-year institution will probably cost $250,000 on its own.

So, as I like to do, I've conducted a little experiment. I decided to save every receipt for every purchase related to bringing a baby into the world. I've also kept an elaborate spreadsheet that I've updated every time we brought something baby-related into the house. Here's the breakdown of what I found.

As of this writing, $8,348.97 has been spent on unborn Baby Awesomerod. The actual full-retail price total that has been spent is $9,436.94. This number includes only the lowest possible health care costs ($175), which, if we didn't have such amazing insurance, would add at least $10,825 to the bill, bringing the total to at least $20,261.94.

Matt and I have personally only spent $2,365.97. So, this number would be significantly higher if 1) we didn't have great health insurance, 2) we didn't have incredibly generous friends and family, and 3) I hadn't been using coupons, comparison shopping, accepting hand-me-downs and being as generally savvy as possible.

Now let me say, before I go any further, that a baby does not need $8,348.97 spent on it before it's born. In fact, a newborn baby needs very little in terms of the true necessities of life. Here is a post from Pregnant Chicken that highlights the few items a baby would actually need. Her items listed come to a total of $257, but she excludes a car seat, which I would add in at roughly $150, bringing her total [before borrowing anything from friends] to around $400. She excludes a stroller as well. She also assumes breastfeeding will work (and not involve any special care items for mom to help with breastfeeding), and therefore doesn't include the costs of formula either. Finally, her plan is that after the first pack of disposable diapers the parents will switch to cloth diapering. So, she really takes the term "necessities" about as far as it can be stretched, which is probably not realistic for most people.

I fully admit that Matt and I are not normal, that we do not live in the real world of people who survive paycheck to paycheck and worry about how they'll pay bills or get food on the table. We live an upper-middle class existence, and though we are not in the top 1% in terms of the Occupy movements (we are solidly part of the 99%), we are no doubt in the top 1% worldwide, just like no doubt most of my readers are as well.

All this said, the financial world our baby is about to enter is "normal" in the circles in which we orbit, so this post is directed toward that audience just to give you an idea of our experience as you may or may not anticipate your own.

How did I arrive at our baby cost figures? There were five areas I tracked: health care, nursery, maternity clothes, gifts, and baby clothes/gear we bought to fill in gaps after we received gifts.

Health care
Our total spending: $175
Actual value: At least $11,000

Breakdown of expenses:
$50 for progesterone supplements co-pay during the first trimester
$100 for hospital delivery co-pay
$25 for private room preference at hospital

I am very aware of the fact that we are exceptionally fortunate to have outstanding health care. Not to get too political, but it is devastating to think about all the people out there who do not have health care and therefore have to pay for routine health care and urgent care costs out-of-pocket. According to this article from WebMD prenatal care can cost approximately $2,000 without insurance, and the hospital bill for an uncomplicated vaginal delivery costs approximately $9,000 without insurance (and $15,000 for an uncomplicated cesarean section without insurance).

The article does point out that another important prenatal health care expense is for prenatal vitamins, which I've been taking for so long I forgot to even include in my baby spending spreadsheet. If you're looking for the best deal on prenatal vitamins, not surprisingly your grocery store's generic brand is just as good as any expensive brand on the market (One a Day as an example of an expensive brands comes to mind). Although I took generics for a couple years, I wanted a vitamin containing DHA and started taking the Nature Made Prenatal Multi + DHA vitamins that Costco sells at $19.99 for 150 softgels. (This blows the Amazon price of $14.79 for 30 softgels out of the water.)

Nursery
Our total spending: $1,067.32
Actual value: $1670.90

I feel like I've written plenty about the nursery, but just to give you a sense of the quick budget breakdown...

Several items came to us as gifts. One major item, the dresser/changing table, thanks to its solid wood construction would have cost hundreds of dollars if we'd bought it new, but Matt snagged it for $40 on Craigslist and gave it lots of TLC. And, of course, I bought a lot of supplies on sale or using coupons.

Paint and paint supplies
Our total spending: $80.12
Actual value: $80.12

Dresser/changing table project
Our total spending: $93.78 ($40 for dresser; $53.78 for supplies to refinish dresser)
Actual value: $311.28

DIY curtains
Our actual spending: $129.11
Actual value: $250.95

The major price difference here happened thanks to the fact that I stumbled upon this fabric when it was 60% off, so I spent $100.74 on 6 yards of fabric instead of a whopping $215.

Furniture and other decor
Our actual spending: $748.93
Actual value: $953.93

Here's what fell into this category: crib, crib mattress, crib skirt materials (for DIY project), chair, ottoman, bookcase, trash can/diaper pail, decal, and framed art work. The major price difference here is again thanks to receiving a few nursery items as gifts.

Storage solutions
Our actual spending: $15.38
Actual value: $74.62

We paid for the iron-on patches; the rest of the items we got through our Container Store gift card.

Maternity clothes
Our total spending: $586.08
Actual value: $769.87

I've written several times about trying to minimize my maternity clothes spending. I think I succeeded. I received several items as gifts and one item as a hand-me-down. I also bought most of the shirts I purchased on sale (though I never seem to find pants of sale normally, and this again applied when shopping for maternity clothes). My obvious maternity splurge was my expensive jeans for $200, but at 39 weeks and 6 days pregnant I stand by that purchase and the fact that they have gotten me through my pregnancy and they will continue to get me through the postpartum period as well (news flash: you're about 6 months pregnant looking after you deliver, and it doesn't go away over night).

I've posted this before here in my ultimate baby to-do list, but I thought for convenience I'd repost below everything that went into the maternity spending category:

BeBand
bra extender
three pairs of work pants (black, gray and khaki) -- my favorite pair of work pants wound up being the $30 gray pants I got at Motherhood Maternity
one pair of nice jeans (Citizens of Humanity Dita Petite Secret Fit Belly Maternity Boot Cut Jeans)
two pairs of maternity leggings (black and gray)
two maternity dresses
one jean skirt (specifically this one from Old Navy that I highly recommend, but remember to order it one or two sizes smaller than your normal size because it runs large)
one nicer skirt
four long-sleeve maternity shirts
eight short-sleeve maternity shirts (tip: scour the sale rack of Target's maternity section as well as Gap Maternity [located inside some Baby Gap stores])
one nursing bra
one nursing tank

I will add that I am fortunate that 1) as a teacher the expectations regarding how fancy I look at work are pretty low, so I didn't need to buy anything particularly formal such as a suit and 2) this has been a really mild fall and winter, so I got away with not needing to buy particularly heavy winter clothing, which is typically more expensive than summer clothes.

Gifts
Our total spending: $0
Actual value: $5983

OK, so this is the one category where the actual value is an estimate, but I think it's a pretty darn accurate estimate. A lot of the gifts we received came from our registry, so that is easy to track, and a lot of other items, such as books and clothes, are fairly easy to track. Specifically, our baby's wardrobe is keeping Carter's in business, so maybe it's worth it to invest in some Carter's stock.

The baby gifts fell into the following categories:
Registry purchases: $2,433.85 -- This includes a lot of the big-ticket baby items such as our car seat, stroller, high chair, Ergo baby carrier, baby monitor, Pack n' Play, exersaucer, infant gym, safety gate, diaper bag, bouncer seat and lots of cloth diapers.
Clothes: $1,107.91 -- We also received several sets of clothing on loan, and the value of those are not included because they do not belong to us
Other (off-registry toys, books, gift cards, cash, etc.): $2,441.24 -- We received several baby gear items as hand-me-downs that we'll be keeping, so I did include the retail value of the infant tub, Bumbo seat, infant swing, and Snap N Go stroller frame in this total. We even got some of our friends' leftover infant disposable diapers since their son has already outgrown them.

As you can see, when I wrote about all the showers (part 1 and 2) thrown in Baby Awesomerod's honor, I was not using hyperbole when I said we are truly wowed and grateful for all the generosity that's been shown our family.

Baby clothes/gear we purchased
Our total spending: $537.57
Actual value: $838.17

This is the category in which I really went bargain hunting and cashed in on sales, clearances, online shopping, and lots of coupons and store credits.

All along I've wanted to purchase clothing for our daughter myself, so I've picked up 22 clothing items, all but two of which I found on sale during trips to Target or Old Navy or bought at TJMaxx, which tends to have great infant clothes selection at highly discounted prices.

The other items that fell into this category I primarily purchased after my first shower. Several of my friends who've already had babies told me that after their main shower they received few if any gifts off their registries. This proved true for us as well. So, there were a number of items no one bought us that I'd consider necessities (such as infant nail clippers or a few baby bottles) and a number of registry items that aren't necessities but I knew I wanted for the future (such as the Stokke Tripp Trapp infant rail or more of the aden + anais muslin burpy bibs). You'll notice that items such as the ones listed above I got entirely through Amazon. A lot of the prices have changed since I made the purchases, another interesting aspect of dealing with Amazon -- if you see a really low price, act fast because that price could change in a matter of hours.

In addition to clothing and registry completion items, this category of spending covers a bunch of small baby purchases such as our first packs of baby wipes and Vaseline. It even covers the five cloth diapers I bought recently at a discount.

Now that so much spending has taken place our daughter will not need much to get her through many months ahead, so we're looking forward to going back to some more normal spending habits.

Nursery reveal!

2011-12-29T08:21:00.001-05:00

We've been working on the nursery ever since July when I started the closet shuffle (parts 1 and 2) to make way for baby in the office-turned-nursery. Now that no further progress will be made on the room before the baby arrives, I figured it's time to put it all together pictorially. So, without further ado....

(If you missed any of the process along the way, you can learn about nursery inspiration, DIY no-sew curtains, paint colors and furniture, the wall decal, a Modge-Podge IKEA bookcase mini-hack, DIY crib skirt, nursery art, storage strategies, and the ottoman reupholstering.)

Nursery progress: Quick ottoman update

2011-12-28T09:00:00.001-05:00

For a while now we've been at a nursery progress stand still. There isn't really anything that needs to be done, but there are some little side projects I can accomplish as we wait on the baby's debut. The easiest of the remaining little projects involved reupholstering the $50 brown ottoman we bought at Target last month.

If you're on the Target website and you search for ottomans, you'll get over 1,000 results. This is no joke. Lots and lots to sort through. I found two light green microsuede ottomans that could have potentially worked in the nursery, but one cost $150 and the other was also over $100. Plus, I couldn't tell if either would be a perfect match to the color of the nursery recliner, so I figured after paying for shipping and then likely having to deal with the hassle of returning the furniture it wasn't worth the risk.

Instead while at the Target store Matt and I bought a circular brown fabric-covered storage ottoman that is the perfect height for the chair and the perfect general size for our relatively small nursery space. I wasn't in love with the ottoman's aesthetics, but I figured this was an opportunity to buy a staple gun and get to work.

I took leftover fabric from the nursery curtains and originally planned to reupholster the entire ottoman, but once I reupholstered the ottoman lid I thought the less-is-more statement worked quite well.

Because I've never upholstered anything before, I once again turned to Young House Love for advice and found this super easy tutorial for reupholstering a cushion, which is essentially what I was doing when I reupholstered the ottoman lid.

So, I went ahead and stapled the leftover curtain fabric at the 12, 3, 6, and 9 o'clock positions on the back of the ottoman lid. Then between each initial staple I performed a series of simple folds and added three more evenly spaced staples. The trickiest part of performing this task is keeping the fabric as taut as possible.

Eventually the entire lid was wrapped with too much leftover fabric, which I simply trimmed off before putting the lid back on the ottoman.

I'm satisfied with the less-is-more approach to the ottoman redesign. I think it gives it some style and makes it more integrated with the nursery decor without going overboard.

Although I could still add a mobile, some floating shelves, and a better solution for getting our additional light and humidifier to fit into our small space, for now I feel like the nursery is done...and that means tomorrow I'll share with you the big reveal!

Showering Baby Awesomerod, part 2

2011-12-27T16:14:00.000-05:00

Continuing on to the next four events held in Baby Awesomerod's honor...

In mid-November while my main event shower was taking place, some of Matt's guy friends from college got together and threw him and his brother (who is expecting a baby in late February) a dual man shower. (BTW, we love the expression "man shower" around these parts.) I assumed this would involve boys sitting around drinking beer. While this was partially true, the actual event was much more organized than I could have imagined.

The boys entered the host's house greeted by a giant door covering featuring questionable baby daddy Justin Bieber. They also enjoyed this custom-made baby cake that required Googling a picture of a baby.

As their special gift, Matt and his brother received matching baby carriers, which will be perfect for manly outdoor activities, such as taking the future babies on a hike.

Matt apparently had the great idea to haze himself by insisting that he and his brother wear the matching, empty baby carriers out and about town after the group left the party to continue watching football at a sports bar. This is my husband.

Thanks to our college friends for throwing this special man shower!

Several weeks after all this, we had another afternoon of simultaneous baby showers, both work-related. Matt's social studies department threw him a really nice baby shower, complete with another adorable cake (this time made out of cupcakes)....

...and we received lots of generous group and individual gifts from Matt's co-workers as well.

My English department has a special tradition of giving new parents from the department a basket full of baby books that various members of the department help assemble. I received this incredible gift during a mini-baby shower portion of my department's monthly meeting at the same time Matt was attending his work baby shower. Building a great library for Baby Awesomerod has been one of my goals, and I'm glad to have such an excellent start with this basket of books which came to us filled with lots of titles unfamiliar to me. That's the best thing about English teachers -- they'll introduce you to books you've never heard of before. We've also received several other great collections of books as baby gifts, and we are so happy to fill our daughter's nursery with as many books as possible.

So far she already has one complete shelf of board books (set at toddler height) and one complete shelf of picture books (set at adult height so she [hopefully] can't access them by herself and rip up the pages).

The last event held in Baby Awesomerod's honor is really dear to my heart because it was organized by my former journalism students. They got together with my friend and colleague Shauntel and planned an after-school shower for me in Shauntel's classroom on my second-to-last day of teaching before starting maternity leave. The fact that so many of my alumni would come back from college to reenter the hallways of their high school and put on an event for me is such a reminder of how special my students are and how fortunate I have been to work with such great people for so many years. Some of my students who attended are getting ready to graduate from college; others are in their junior year of high school; all are special to me.

As a treat, Matt was able to attend as well, which is perfect because he's a bit of a celebrity among my students, for no reason other than the fact that he's married to me and I suppose my students are interested in my personal life.

There was another awesome cake, this time bearing the nickname my students coined for me.

There was a hilarious shower game that involved my students cutting out images from magazines in order to piece together a picture of what our daughter will look like. These were the perfect people to participate in such a challenge because 1) they're a competitive bunch, 2) they're really creative and funny and 3) they apparently follow this blog rather religiously and therefore have uncanny knowledge of my life.

The winning team and the runners-up were crowned by Matt and me based on not only the picture they created of the actual baby, but also because of the ways in which they incorporated really specific details from my life into their collages (i.e. "Here's a bird because your nursery has an unintentional bird theme.") Other students put a broom in our daughter's hand symbolizing the amount of housework I'm going to make her do (ha!). One group sort of gave up on the challenge and just cut out from a magazine a very Pottery Barn Kids-esque room scene with a super organized wall of bookcases, which actually isn't such a bad way to symbolize the child Matt and I could create.

In addition to group gifting us our Fisher Price bouncer (which I am so excited to own!)...

...many of my students brought us adorable baby clothes, including cute onesies, tiny socks, baby sunglasses (!) and this precious little dress one of my students who now attends U.Va. -- our alma mater -- gave Baby Awesomerod. We can't wait to dress her up this spring and summer!

My former students' generosity is really astounding, and I appreciate how they too have formed a presence in our daughter's nursery.

Matt and I are so fortunate to have wonderful people surrounding us in every aspect of our lives, and we're so grateful for everything everyone has done to help us celebrate and welcome a new life into the world. (One of my former students even thanked me for having a baby, which I thought was super sweet.) We cannot wait to begin this next stage of life surrounded by so much love. THANK YOU!

Showering Baby Awesomerod, part 1

2011-12-26T10:42:00.000-05:00

To date there have been five (!) events in Baby Awesomerod's honor, and I thought now would be a good time to post a recap and to express our gratitude in mass electronic form to everyone once more (now that the final individual thank you notes have been written). Today I'll write about the main event, and tomorrow I'll fill you in on all the other goodness that came our way since then.

The main event was in mid-November hosted by two of my very best friends, Susannah and Lindsay. Susannah and I are friends from back in the days of seventh grade when we passed notes in the hallways between classes. Lindsay and I met on move-in day of first year of college as we were two of the 10 girls living together in our dorm suite. Both girls are classy, creative and know me well, and the shower they threw reflected how much thought and hard work they put into a truly personal event.

They decorated the house in oranges, grays and greens in honor of the nursery's color palette. The hand-sewn cardstock streamers from Etsy and the tissue-paper pom poms made pretty decorative statements.

They also said they "attempted" what they called a "quasi-book-theme" by balancing plates of food on top of stacks of board books and by decorating the pumpkin cupcakes (it was November!) with little flags containing classic children's book covers.

When guests arrived the hostesses greeted them with a piece of cardstock paper (decorated with prints from adorable baby-inspired stamps), a pen and a clothespin so they could write well wishes to Baby Awesomerod and hang their contributions to the ribbons on the wall. These became a cute team-effort decoration as well as a perfect keepsake when Susannah presented me with all the cards sealed inside an old wooden cigar box at the end of the shower. Since then I've added all the other cards we've received for Baby Awesomerod to that box, and hopefully in the next couple days (if baby stays put) I'm going to start her baby book by adding some sonogram pictures, pregnancy photos, and cards.

After everyone arrived and enjoyed great food (Lindsay is known for her mad cooking skills), Susannah got the main part of the event kicked off by having everyone in attendance go around and say her name and how she knows me. I was really happy she did this as it allowed friends from different parts of my life to mingle more easily because the gift-opening portion of the shower was quite informal (the way I like it) with standing-room-only space making it so that everyone felt free to move around the house, nibble on food, and chat with one another instead of staring at me in silence making the obligatory baby shower ohhhs and ahhs each time I opened a gift. Listening to my friends' and family members' quick introductions got me a little choked up as I looked out at my friends from high school, college, work, and general adult life; my family from Northern Virginia and Richmond; my mother-in-law's friends who attended. It reminded me of an email my friend Courtney sent me the day we found out Baby Awesomerod is a girl, and she said how lucky this baby is to grow up surrounded by so many strong women. I couldn't have said it better -- the women in my life are independent and strong and have made me who I am today, and for that I am most grateful.

On a less-sentimental note, as every woman in attendance introduced herself, she cut a piece of twine representing her estimate of the circumference of my belly. At the end of the gift-opening portion of the shower everyone tested her string theory (obligatory nerd joke, check) and most grossly overestimated my belly's size. The two who came closest were Susannah's mom and my friend Emily (who flew in from Louisville, another amazing surprise!), but Emily won by about a centimeter and received an awesome fruit tart (I believe that was the prize, but by that point in the day I was on sensory overload).

My little sister was one of the worst offenders in the overestimating category. Check out all that extra twine! I'll get you, my pretty, when it's your turn!

Of course, the gifts were the main event, and we received an incredibly generous outpouring of baby gear for our little one on the way. Many items came from our Buy Buy Baby registry (for the record, I still hate the name of that store). This was really helpful because it meant I left my mid-November shower with virtually everything we would need for our baby's first year of life. She received few items of clothing at this shower, but she has made up for it by getting a fully stocked closet from other generous friends' and family members' gifts since the initial shower.

Everyone made fun of me for how excited I was to receive a bunch of cloth diapers, but then my friend Katy, who has used cloth diapers for her two children, gave the ultimate cloth diaper demonstration (not on an actual baby). The crowd genuinely ohhhed and ahhhhhed as they got the low-down on modern cloth-diaper technology.

There are so many amazing gifts we received, and I am still amazed at how generous people are when a couple is having their first baby, but two that especially stood out were of the homemade variety. One great gift was from my high school friend Zoe who followed this post from Oh Joy! and custom-made these two freezer-paper onesies. One clearly labels our daughter as Baby Awesomerod, and the other has a little beach scene, likely paying homage to the many trips we're known to take with friends to Duck, NC.

The other amazing homemade gift, and the one that made me cry, was a collective group effort from my four best friends from high school. All made it to my shower, which was a special gift by itself as they traveled from Philadelphia, New York City and Denver for the event, but then they gave me another tiny onesie that melted my heart. It reads "11th Guy" on the front and "5 x 2 + 1 = 11" on the back. Here's the sentiment behind all the code: in high school we called ourselves Five Guys, partially in honor of the original Five Guys restaurant that wasn't far from our science and technology magnet high school (nerds!). Then we all got married between 2005 and 2009 and officially became 10 Guys. Now that I'm having the first baby of the group we'll soon be 11 Guys. The back of the onesie with the math equation is a nod to our nerdy science-and-tech roots. The onesie itself may not seem like a big deal to anyone outside our little circle, but to me it's a symbol of the ways in which our relationships have grown since we all met in 1995 and how we've grown together even though there's so much physical distance between us. These are the girls for whom you would fly across the country at a moment's notice. I know they'll be there for my daughter like they've been there for me.

And they love it how even though I may have a giant belly these days, I haven't changed my dancing habits since high school. For some reason it truly cracks them up when I dance around with a goofy expression and rub my belly. I nearly kill them.

To wrap up shower #1 (of 5! no worries, the rest will go more quickly), our gracious hosts encouraged each guest to take a little favor bag filled with kettle corn, my all-time favorite snack. The best part? Check out the handmade bags!

A final special thank you to everyone who made the day so special! It is an event that will stay with me for as long as my memory holds out :)

Maternity leave cankles

2011-12-23T08:18:00.000-05:00

It's time to dance a jig: I'm on maternity leave!

Blurry photos = action shots!

Yesterday while my teaching career for the moment ended with a fizzle (it was the day winter break was beginning, so no kids wanted to work and I certainly wasn't going to assign something new or grade something new) I backed up my files, organized my notebooks, responded to final emails, said goodbye to my students and colleagues, turned in my laptop, and left behind my keys for my long-term substitute. Walking down our school's massive hallway for the last time was a bit surreal as I thought about how the next time I'll be there working many months in the future I'll have a baby.

And that is OK.

New stage of life is about to commence.

Appropriately, I scheduled my 38-week doctor's appointment for 3:30 yesterday, so I really couldn't linger at work after all was said and done.

Sitting in the doctor's office waiting for my doctor to come do her thing, I looked down at my feet. I made Matt bear witness to this too. All I can say is
HOLY
CANKLES
BATMAN.

When I was 32 weeks pregnant I wrote about how I'd managed to avoid lots of common pregnancy discomforts, including swelling. Then between 35 and 36 weeks I had a couple days of ankle swelling, but the swelling came and went quickly. Then something happened yesterday. The ankle swelling came and got worse and worse. It became feet swelling and calf swelling, too. I don't know what triggered this, but I'm assuming this is just one thing that's destined to happen to most of us by late pregnancy, and I'm just lucky that it happened 1) at 38.5 weeks pregnant, 2) at my doctor's office so she could reassure me that this, while gross, is in the range of normal and 3) on the day my maternity leave began, so at least now I can sit at home with my feet propped up. So, body, thanks for cooperating on that front.

As you may know, swelling (called edema) occurs in pregnancy because of water retention and the way blood circulates through the pregnant body at a slower pace, but it's also something doctors take seriously if it happens in a pregnant woman's hands and, more importantly, face. When swelling happens in the cankle department doctors just shake their heads and say, "Yes, it's unpleasant, but it's just a thing you have to deal with." Excessive swelling, especially in the face and puffiness around the eyes, can be a sign of preeclampsia, a serious condition of late pregnancy involving high blood pressure. So, I'll be closely monitoring my swelling and making sure it doesn't extend to other parts of my body, but the good news is that somehow my late-pregnancy blood pressure has been lower than my early-pregnancy blood pressure when, according to my doctor, usually the opposite occurs.

So how can you deal with cankles in late pregnancy? Unfortunately, despite my best efforts, these are probably going to just be a reality until sometime after delivery. Here are a few pointers I've picked up from my doctor (that are very similar to the ones posted over at BabyCenter):

1) Ironically, while much swelling is related to water retention, you can actually reduce swelling by drinking more water. I do not have a problem drinking plenty of water every day, but I am being hyper conscious of it. Yesterday evening I had five glasses of water in three hours.

2) Don't stay in one position for too long. Neither standing for extended periods nor sitting for extended periods is the best idea; instead, frequent shifting is a good idea.

3) This isn't new info, but as a reminder sitting with your feet propped up or lying down can help reduce swelling, which is usually at its worst at night. This is why after waking up in the morning swelling from the previous day should diminish some.

4) Taking walks can also help with swelling. Matt and I have been trying to take advantage of this mild fall and winter thus far with daily dog walks together as much as possible. I think it does help, and it might also be part of the reason why I'm almost 2 cm. dilated as of yesterday!

In almost perfect timing, Matt's colleague gave him (to pass along to me) a tube of Burt's Bees Mama Bee Leg and Foot Cream last week. I've put it on several times at night, and while I can't say definitively that it has reduced swelling (because sleep itself is probably the best way to reduce swelling) I can say the tingly sensation it gives me from the peppermint extract makes my legs feel good and makes our room smell better at night.

Frankly, these cankles suck because not only are they ugly (which I can deal with) but they do make movement less pleasant. Still, I am fortunate to have inherited my mother's good genes that lead to relatively easy pregnancies, and for that I am thankful.

Car seat installation check: check!

2011-12-19T21:02:00.000-05:00

On Saturday we checked off the baby to-do list the final item that must be completed before Baby Awesomerod's arrival: having the police evaluate the installation of our infant car seat. We're really glad we took advantage of this free service because it turns out that we, like the vast majority of expectant parents, had improperly installed our car seat.

We have one of the most popular car seat models, the Graco SnugRide 35 (in the Hathaway pattern)...

...and two identical car seat bases (one for Matt's car and one for mine)

Before I share what we learned, I thought I'd give you a sense of what the event was like. First of all, we had to wait a bit for our car seat check, but it was worth it based on all we learned. There were four sets of police officers checking cars, and there were five cars in front of us when we showed up. It took us about 30 minutes of waiting in line before we were up. Matt and I each drove our cars to the event because we have two car seat bases (one for each car) so I figured we should get both checked at the same time to make certain we installed them correctly. Fortunately, because we have all new equipment (both the car seat as well as the matching bases) we were in and out of there faster than anyone else, with only about 10 minutes total spent on our two cars. Apparently a lot of people install used equipment, which often makes the installation process more complicated, especially if the models are slightly outdated. I watched one woman get 30 minutes of help from three police officers at once.

To Matt's credit, he read the manual that came with our car seat and looked up information about other parents' installation stories online. He followed the directions perfectly. The reason hardly anyone installs a car seat properly, though, is that the instructions themselves are lacking, at least according to what the police would like to see.

Here's what the police are looking for:

1) The car seat should be positioned rear-facing in the back seat. This one is a given. The one piece of news you may have missed is that children should stay in rear-facing car seats for at least two years, or ideally even longer. Apparently, though, lots of parents report that children's growing legs get in the way of making the two-year-or-more rule a reality.

2) The car seat may be positioned in the middle of the back seat or behind either the driver's seat or the passenger's seat. The police indicated no preferences here.

3) The car seat needs to be positioned at a 45 degree angle. This is something we had not done correctly. Fortunately, our car seat base has an angle adjusting mechanism, making this a really easy fix with a couple turns of a knob. For those car seat bases that do not have this capability, the police had on hand Styrofoam pool noddles (the type with a hollow middle) that they cut into pieces the width of a car seat. They used these pool noddle pieces to elevate the car seat bases to the correct angle.

4) The car seat should not move at all from left to right. Matt did this correctly using our vehicles' latch systems and pulling with all his might.

5) There needs to be significant space between the edge of the car seat and the back of the front seats because the car seat SHOULD be able to move up and down. (At first this seemed odd to me, but then I learned...) this is because the same general laws of physics that are at work with an adult seat belt during an accident apply to an infant car seat. Here's another place where we messed up. We both drive compact cars -- I have a 2003 Mazda Protege and Matt has a 2003 Volkswagen GTI. Neither car is particularly large, but neither car is exactly a Mini Cooper, either. Still, you don't appreciate how little space you have in your car's back seat until you put these giant infant car seats in them. These suckers really eat away your space! So, the police moved our front passenger seats up nearly as far as they would go and then said, "See, that's done correctly." Forget the fact that this means that if Matt, me and Baby Awesomerod are all traveling together in the same car, it's likely to be a little Driving Miss Daisy for a while in our vehicles, as Matt escorts the baby and me around town chauffeur-style.

When we just put in the base, we thought, "Wow, this isn't so bad!"

Then we put the car seat IN the base and reality set in. Tight squeeze!

Of course, finding out that it's nearly impossible to sit in the front passenger seats of our car when the infant car seat is in place got Matt a little excited as he contemplated the prospects of getting a new car sooner than we were planning. For me, though, I'd rather just suck it up for a couple years and continue to save our money. We don't have a payment on either car, and as I enter my maternity leave (only three more days of teaching!) I would rather not have any new bills as we'll be financially stretching ourselves already. Fortunately, we are not alone in this venture, as every other set of new parents at Saturday's car seat event were in similarly compact cars, frowning as they realized how much car space a little baby will take up.

6) The police discourage parents from installing any additional car seat accessories

Although I wish there was some more space to spare in our cars, I'm glad we had our car seats professionally checked for the piece of mind it offers. Now our ride home from the hospital will be terrifying only because we're bringing a tiny human along with us, not because we have to worry about whether or not we've strapped her car seat in correctly.

Packing a maternity-ward hospital bag

2011-12-15T21:26:00.000-05:00

Last week at my 36-week appointment I found out that I am exhibiting faster progress toward labor than I anticipated. I assumed I would be at least a week late delivering. With a Jan. 2 due date, I thought a Jan. 10 birthday sounded like a nice round number. Plus, my easy pregnancy has mimicked my mother's pregnancies almost perfectly, and because she was agonizingly late delivering my older brother, her first-born, I assumed I would be late delivering my first-born too. Well, jury's still out on this one, but my doctor claims she believes I will not go past my due date. Time will tell!

That said, after last Thursday's appointment I went into insane pregnant woman overdrive on Friday. I stayed at work super late, especially considering it was a Friday. I got all my school work in order. Then I realized, if this baby arrives tomorrow I would not have a packed hospital bag ready to go.

Now that I've mostly packed my bags, I thought I would share my strategy. I know there are tons of hospital-bag-packing lists out there like this one from BabyCenter, but I found most of them a little more cumbersome than I could bear. I'm a light packer by nature (you might recall the nearly four weeks I spent in Europe with my carry-on luggage), and going to the hospital is no exception. Also, although I'm far from a germaphobe, I'd like to limit how much of my stuff I bring into the hospital.

Taking the advice of the nurses on my hospital tour and at my childbirth class, I packed two separate bags. One smaller bag will be for the labor and delivery room, and the other one Matt will bring in from the car once we've settled into our overnight room. Here's what made it into each:

Labor and delivery room bag (a small duffel-type bag)

Socks! -- This I realize is probably the one thing I'll be wearing besides the standard-issue hospital gown.
Cheap flip flops -- in case I get up to walk around and putting on shoes is too cumbersome. I don't want any clothing that could get ruined in the labor room.
A small toiletries bag that contains lip balm (apparently lips get quite chapped during delivery), a small tube of toothpaste, two toothbrushes (for Matt and me), a small bottle of mouthwash, elastic headbands and hair ties, deodorant (though who knows about this one....just seems useful to have on hand)
A bag of sugar-free hard candies for me when that and Popsicles are all I'm allowed to ingest
Easy snacks for Matt such as granola bars and pretzels
A small wallet with $20 in cash, $5 in quarters (for vending machines)...and if it's possible to make the switcheroo when I go into labor I'll add my photo ID, insurance card, and one credit card to the mix (or else I'll just take whatever's in my purse!)
Small point-and-shoot camera and charger
Charger for iPad and iPhones (thankfully it's the same one!)
Magazines
Journal that I've been writing in to Baby Awesomerod and a pen
Receipts indicating that I've already paid for my private room and paid my insurance co-pay (even though the hospital claims I don't need to bring these items, this is the one time in my life when printing out and bringing my receipt seems like a good idea). Can I just say how bizarre it is to have paid for the delivery of a baby who hasn't yet been born?

On delivery day we'll add our iPad and iPhones to the bag so we can pass the time with hospital WiFi and stay in touch with people. (And so I can blog between contractions....I kid, I kid!)

Overnight room bag (a small carry-on suitcase)

Cheap navy blue draw-string PJ bottoms and matching navy blue knee-length robe, both by Gilligan & O'Malley from Target
Magenta henley sleep shirt (that buttons down the front for easy nursing access), Xhilaration from Target
Gray nursing tank, also by Gilligan & O'Malley from Target
Wireless nursing bra from A Pea in the Pod
Lansinoh nursing products: disposable nursing pads, lanolin cream, soothies gel pads
Extra socks for me
My slippers!
Underwear for going home (will I wear them? I don't know!)
Going home outfit for me: gray maternity sweatshirt (thank you, Cara!) and loose-fitting yoga-esque black pants (and if all goes according to plan, I'll be wear sneakers to and from the hospital)
Change of clothes for Matt
Clothes for Matt to sleep in
Cheap flip flops for Matt for the shower
Our Canon Rebel XTi digital SLR and charger for when we're ready to take better photos
Going home outfit for Baby Awesomerod -- I opted for a fleece footed onesie in newborn size and threw in the bag a newborn onesie (which she probably won't wear) and a 0-3 month long-sleeve button T-shirt (that she probably will wear under her footed onesie since she'll have her little umbilical stump still secured to her belly button). Oh, and her amazing knit bunny hat from my friend Sam!
Some extra snacks
Travel pack of baby wipes -- This is recommended in Baby 411, the book I'm currently chugging through. Apparently some hospitals do not use baby wipes, but when the parents are changing the baby's meconium-filled diaper they prefer wipes to hospital gauze pads.
Bigger bag of toiletries than the one in the labor/delivery bag: shampoo, conditioner, soap, body wash, face wash, hair products, eye cream, make up and make up remover (so I can feel like a human and take at least a couple photos other people can see...not on Facebook, though, and probably not on this blog -- I am not afraid to admit my own vanity)

Speaking of toiletries, how awesome is this little case I picked up for $0.99 at The Container Store that is the perfect size for holding a couple days' worth of tinted moisturizer? Fantastic!

Other:

Two pillows in brightly striped pillow cases -- This is encouraged by the hospital so that our pillows don't get mixed in with the hospital's pillows. As an added bonus, inspired by Young House Love, having a fun pillowcase will make early photo ops a little more cheerful and less focused on my I'm-in-the-hospital-having-just-given-birth case of the uglies.
Boppy pillow to keep in the car and then see if I need it later
An old towel and plastic garbage bag are already in the car in case my water breaks (on the way to the hospital or before then)
The infant car seat, that we're getting checked this weekend (turns out our county does occasionally offer car seat installation inspections, and one is happening this Saturday)

I will not be wearing my wedding rings or any other jewelry, and if I had to guess Matt won't be wearing his wedding band either. We both are in the habit of taking our rings off at home, so I'm sure we'd want to do that in the hospital, too, which would be a bad scene.

What did you use the most from your hospital bags? Anything you wished you'd added or left out?

Birth plan is an oxymoron

2011-12-14T16:30:00.000-05:00

One of the most often asked questions of my late pregnancy has been, "What is your birth plan?" Some people have said that because I'm organized I must have a really specific list of requirements.

Here's the plan: get that baby out as quickly and painlessly as possible (for me and her).

I say this in seriousness with just the slightest hint of humor because I have reached my Zen state regarding the lack of control that comes with trying to conceive, with pregnancy and now with childbirth.

In an ideal world I would get an epidural that works, avoid a C-section and avoid the use of forceps. [If you don't know me in real life (and even if you do) you probably don't know about my literally scarring experience in my own birth with the use of forceps. Basically, although my birth went rather quickly, I was in distress at the very end and the doctor used forceps to get me out. In the process, he squeezed my head too hard and I started exhibiting early warning signs of Bell's palsy. In an effort to save my face and my vision (something else doctors were worried about) my mom diligently massaged my temples for the first two years of my life, especially while breastfeeding me when I was an infant. Now my permanent wound only shows up when I'm laughing, yawning or imbibing some alcohol and therefore less attempting to control my wonky left eye.]

I learned at my childbirth class the rather scary statistic that epidurals only work on 85 percent of the population. What about those poor 15 remaining percent of women? I could be one of them, so I need to be OK with that.

No one wants a C-section....or rather, no one preparing for a vaginal delivery wants a C-section (seeing as lots of people apparently want elective C-sections).

And I don't think anyone wants ~~the Medieval torture device~~ forceps anywhere near their nether regions.

Yet all these things happen to some people, and I suppose some people experience all of them.

When I brought up these three simple wishes of mine with my doctor and asked if it was even worth putting in writing, she said it wouldn't really help because my three requests are standard protocol anyway. And I'm reasonable and understand that anything can change at any moment.

No matter how it happens, getting this baby out of my body will likely be the greatest accomplishment of my life thus far. I know some women are disappointed when they wind up getting a C-section, and while it's not my first choice, I know that growing another human life and bringing it into the world are pretty freakin' impressive feats however they come about.

Maximizing minimal laundry room space

2011-12-13T04:07:00.001-05:00

Yes, it's 4 a.m. on a Tuesday, and I've been awake since 2 a.m., unable to sleep, so I figured I would blog. I'm not tired, just really pregnant. Finally full-term at 37 weeks. Baby could come any day now, but I would be happy for her to hold off until at least Dec. 22, my last day of work for a really long time! And now, a post on laundry....

In the nearly two years (!) that I've been writing this blog, I do not believe I've ever once written about our laundry room. Probably because attributing the word "room" to this space is too generous. Probably because it's impossible to photograph. But most probably because up until last month I didn't have any good ideas for laundry room storage.

Our laundry room is a glorified utility closet. It shares its space with our water heater and furnace. Its walls are unfinished cinder block and wood. Its concrete floor has pipes running over it; thankfully, the previous owners created some sort of elevated wooden walkway contraption that allows you to actually walk in the laundry room without stepping on pipes. The room is barely wide enough to fit a regular-size top-loading washer and dryer. And the space completely lacks any type of storage.

Well, let me rephrase. The room we inherited did come with one tiny organizational solution. One small gift left behind by the previous owners: a metal bar attached to the ceiling by two bungee cords, which is a nice place to store our extra hangers and drape a couple items of drying clothing. Side note: did you know you can donate your dry cleaning wire hangers to many dry cleaners? Whenever Matt goes in for a big dry cleaning run (we dry clean infrequently) I have him take an old stack of wire hangers back. We've tried this at several different dry cleaners and all have graciously accepted them. Look at the background of this photo, and you'll get a better sense of the kind of space we're dealing with in the laundry room.

With so little space to work with, laundry room storage has proven a challenge. For years we've had all our supplies piling up in the small corner wedged between the wall and the washer, a space that is at most just shy of a foot wide. I've bought and returned several different shelving solutions for the space, but all of them proved just centimeters too narrow until I found these half-large flat wire stacking shelves at The Container Store. I brought home two ($19.99 each) and after Matt spent about 15 minutes repositioning the washer and dryer closer together and closer to the far wall centimeter by centimeter, I finally had exactly 11.75" in width in which to squeeze these bad boys into place. At 16" high, the shelves provide the perfect amount of space for laundry room supplies, particularly large bottles and boxes.

You may notice that on top of the top shelf I have two different types of Tide detergent. Here's a reality of my new life that I know will become only more true when the baby arrives: I am doing more laundry these days. Because I did not buy an extensive maternity wardrobe, and because I especially did not buy much in the way of winter maternity clothing, I am doing laundry almost once a week as opposed to once every six weeks (yes, I have enough underwear to last a lifetime, so in my typical non-pregnant life I can get away with not doing laundry for ages). So, this means I've temporarily stopped making my own laundry detergent, though I still have all the supplies on hand for when I'm ready to resume. My guess is that won't be for a while because I know I'm about to start doing laundry every day.

I placed on the top shelf the items that I am most likely to reach for now. You'll notice that the shelves are currently packed because Matt and I have completed our pre-baby supply-hoarding for all household goods. Besides my two types of Tide (one is with bleach alternative and the other is free of fragrances and dyes for washing baby clothes and supplies), I also have on the top shelf:

our giant box of Bounce dryer sheets
an unopened tub of Baby Oxi Clean
a Tide stain remover spray bottle
white vinegar -- at the ready with a funnel for mixing my DIY daily shower spray/window cleaner or adding a cup to the washer when cleaning towels and sheets to de-funk them
measuring cups
scissors -- a great laundry room addition to cutting little stray threads and tags off clothes
clothes pins
dryer balls -- they really do work at reducing the time it takes to dry your clothes, and they work well on fluffing anything that's better off without fabric softener

No good way to get this photo. See how little space I'm working with?

One other laundry room must-have I should mention: a small garbage can. This is ideal for throwing out used dryer sheets, the trappings of the dryer lint catcher, and, if you're like us, holey socks.

My simple laundry room reorganization came at the perfect time. Not only am I already doing more laundry, and not only is that laundry pile about to grow exponentially, but also it's so much easier to reach everything I need over my enormous stomach now that items are in easy reach rather than piled on the floor. I know once I have the baby I'll be less interested in contorting my body to fit into the laundry room nooks and crannies. Even Matt agrees that this storage solution makes being in the laundry room so much more comfortable, and he doesn't have a watermelon in his stomach.

Nursery progress: Storage solutions

2011-12-07T22:15:00.000-05:00

Although our nursery space is rather small (9 feet by 10 feet) we're fortunate that it contains a really nice sized closet that came to us already containing adequate shelving. With the majority of the baby-gear purchasing over, it was time to figure out how to maximize the space. In addition to the closet, we also have storage in the bookcase and in the dresser/changing table Matt refinished.

So I decided, as I'm guessing most soon-to-be-parents do, that the dresser would house her diapering supplies and most of her clothing (with space for even more cute items to hang in the closet), and the closet would contain her bedding and similar supplies. During my trip to The Container Store a few weeks ago I used more of the gift card my students had given me last year to get several bins that would work in both the closet and the dresser.

Specifically, I found these inexpensive canvas bins in three different sizes and settled on one large bin ($11.99), two medium-sized bins ($9.99 each) and two small bins ($7.99 each). It took me a while to convince myself this was the route to go. I kept thinking I could/should go with a cuter option, or a set of wicker baskets, or something along those lines. But as I perused the store I kept coming back to the plain canvas bins. Then it finally struck me: I could decorate them. I don't know why it took me so long to figure that one out.

At first I was going to use the leftover material from the curtains, but the pattern proved too large for the size of the bins (plus I have other ideas for that material). Then when getting some more hem tape at Jo-Ann Fabrics I happened upon some iron-on decals that fit the nursery's look quite well (and one is even a bird, which fits my whole inadvertently-having-lots-of-birds-in-the-nursery motif). These also meet my requirement for decor that does not necessitate sewing. Sold. The time between arriving home with the decals and applying them to the bins was just under an hour. I also used one piece of orange scrapbook paper and my label maker to create some simple labels for the bins -- which thankfully come with built-in label space.

The big bin contains the handmade quilts and blankets Baby Awesomerod is inheriting from my own babyhood.

The two medium bins are for smaller blankets, bedding, changing pad covers and the like.

The two smaller bins, which look strikingly similar to the two medium-sized bins pictured above, contain burp cloths, bibs, and towels and washcloths.

We also have a sixth storage basket in our closet, one that came filled with books at my shower last month, and now it houses Swaddle Me wraps and Halo and Aden + Anais sleep sacks.

Inside the dresser/changing table I added a couple other inexpensive storage bins, as I discovered that not only are babies small, but so is their stuff, and it needs to be contained. I got this narrow eco-stripe drawer organizer ($7.99) for various toiletries and health items that would be useful to have on hand in the nursery (in the middle of the night? Most likely...)

and this small square eco-stripe drawer organizer ($4.99) is perfect for her adorable little collection of socks. So painfully cute.

On the cuteness scale, though, perhaps I spoke too soon. I used a small wooden bin that a Johnson and Johnson baby gift set came in to contain all her hats. If there's anything cuter in the world than baby socks it is undoubtedly baby hats. Bonus points for a winter baby who gets to wear adorable knit hats with bunny ears. Too much.

Finally, two shelves of the bookcase currently house two red baskets I picked up over the summer at Home Goods ($12.99 each). For now one is home to all her toys (she has an appropriate amount of toys for a newborn, which would be not that many...it seems sufficient). The other is home to miscellaneous items that needed to be corralled, including extra baby wipes, pacifiers I've picked up for free from various mom-to-be giveaways (still on the fence about pacifiers...we'll see how it goes) and items like our Bum Genius cloth diaper sprayer that we'll get around to installing in our guest bathroom upstairs when it's time to start cloth diapering (we don't plan to use the cloth diapers in the very beginning, mostly because everyone we know who has used them says they'll be too small for a newborn).

Of course, as with all things organizational, I imagine this nursery storage strategy will evolve over time as we figure out what works and what doesn't and what our specific baby needs the most.

What nursery storage hints have you discovered work for you?

Baby class 2: Childbirth Express

2011-12-04T21:46:00.002-05:00

From the ages of about 10 to 28, childbirth was my greatest fear in life. Then that fear was temporarily replaced by the greater fear of not being able to get pregnant. Now, to bring things full circle, I rediscovered my intense fear of childbirth in October during our hospital tour. And I realized I needed to do something about it.

Basically, for some reason when I was a little kid I watched some Liftetime-esque movie about a woman hemorrhaging so badly during labor that she died. Even though dying during childbirth in modern America is a fairly irrational fear, it is a fear I possess nonetheless. While we were on our October hospital tour I was doing fine until about two-thirds of the way through the tour, when the mantra, "This is where I am going to die" started going through my head, I started seeing stars, the sides of my visual field started turning black, and I told Matt I was just going to sit down (in the middle of the hallway, right in front of the nursery, amidst a gaggle of pregnant women and their partners) for a few minutes. Right as I sat down a nurse approached me, told me I was gray and this wasn't OK, gave me orange juice and put me in a rolling chair.

At that moment, I felt pathetic, and I knew that I needed to do something.

So I asked my doctor for some suggestions for handling my fear of childbirth. She suggested I read What to Expect When You're Expecting. I think you know about my history with that book. Check and check (and check). I clearly needed better solutions.

So I asked my friend Laura, who's a midwife, to see if she had any books she'd recommend. She very generously let me borrow several of her books including...

Planning for Pregnancy, Birth and Beyond by the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists

...which gave me some slightly more medical insights into the birthing process than what I gained through reading and rereading What to Expect...

The Labor Progress Handbook by Penny Simkin and Ruth Ancheta

...which is intended more for doctors, nurses and midwives than regular old joes like me, but it did give me a few pointers about natural delivery (which I do not plan to have, but you never know!)...

and The Baby Catcher by Peggy Vincent

...which is the memoir of a nurse midwife and probably my favorite pregnancy-related book I've ever read. Even if you are not pregnant and never plan to be pregnant, I think this would be a fascinating read for a lot of people to offer insights into a profession you may not have thought about much before now. Almost every chapter tells the birth story of a different woman Vincent worked with throughout her career. While nearly everyone went the medication-free route under Vincent's care and took overall different approaches to labor than I envision myself taking, I really enjoyed getting different perspectives on the birthing process.

After all this reading, and after consulting with my girlfriends who've given birth within the last four years, I decided Matt and I could benefit from a childbirth class more thorough than the two-hour class offered through Kaiser Permanente. So I signed us up for the aptly named Childbirth Express class offered through INOVA health systems, since I'll be delivering Baby Awesomerod at an INOVA hospital. As my friend Jenny, who is a nurse, pointed out, there's an added benefit in taking a class with the nurses who work at the hospital where you'll be delivering. If only it were true that taking a class titled Childbirth Express could guarantee that you'll have an express delivery. If only.

Matt and I spent the better part of our Sunday attending this class for six hours, and we shelled out $150 for the privilege. In the end, though, I would say it was time and money well spent, not because the class blew my mind in any way (it did not) or taught me a lot I didn't already know from my reading and conversations with my doctor (ditto), but it did offer me some piece of mind. I feel like I am as close to conquering my fears now as I can be until the day itself arrives.

The most important take away for me from both reading The Baby Catcher and taking Childbirth Express would be this: I am going to *try* to manage my labor for as long as possible before getting an epidural. I fully, fully intend to get an epidural, but I see the benefits in laboring on my own for as long as I can handle it before I scream for the epidural. So, maybe that still means I'll just be two centimeters dilated when I request the epidural, but maybe I can make it to five centimeters (I won't press my luck for more than that, but again, who knows).

While trying to go a little longer without an epidural would be my main childbirth revelation of the last two months, Matt and I did take away some more specific, practical information from Childbirth Express regarding labor and delivery, specifically:

1) Pack two hospital bags -- one that you'll take to the labor and delivery room, and one that your partner can bring to the room you'll spend the rest of your time in after the baby's arrival. I am sure I'll post about this more at some point and share my hospital bag packing strategy, but the main idea here is that you don't need that much stuff with you during labor and delivery, and there are items you clearly will not need until the baby shows up, such as a going home outfit for you and for your little one.

2) Plan to head to the hospital when your contractions are 5 minutes apart, lasting 1 minute each, and they've been following that pattern for 1 hour. The iPhone app (did I tell you I got the iPhone 4S? Probably not. Well, I did.) that I downloaded yesterday, Contraction Master, also alerts you to go to the hospital when you reach this point. And I gladly forked over my $1.99 for the first app I've ever purchased (with a hilarious name to boot) so that an electronic gadget can tell me to go to the hospital.

3) If you're panting you can't push. I thought this was a useful tidbit for attempting to avoid delivering your baby on the side of the road. Although our instructor definitely emphasized appropriate breathing techniques to get you through labor or (more likely, as she pointed out) to get you to the point when you have an epidural, she mentioned that if you're stuck in traffic and worried you might not make it to the hospital in time, pant and do everything she told us not to do to help labor progress in order to keep that baby in until you make it to the hospital.

4) You should be able to feel your legs after the epidural has taken full effect. This is useful to know so I can advocate for myself (or, more likely, get Matt to advocate for me). I've had several friends mention that they couldn't feel their legs after epidural administration, so I was interested to hear the nurse's take on this.

5) Work with gravity. This is the one tidbit that, in and of itself, I knew already, but our nurse went over some specific examples that helped me make sense of all this. Specifically, in early labor, especially before heading to the hospital, walk around and keep your legs open. If you're experiencing back labor (which results from the baby's head descending in the wrong direction, something I did not know before) try leaning over a chair and perform a pelvic rock and/or apply an ice pack to your back. Probably the most fascinating gravity strategy she demonstrated was going into butterfly stretch position after receiving an epidural as a way to gently nudge the baby down. All this time I thought women with epidurals had to just lie in bed on their backs or on their sides, and realizing that the butterfly stretch could be achieved and be effective was eye-opening for me.

6) In case your water breaks while you're asleep, a plastic sheet, shower curtain liner or heavy, folded towel underneath your mattress pad might be a worthy investment to protect your mattress. I think I might just try the towel option, as this is not a major concern of mine (famous last words, right?).

Additionally, it was helpful for me to see some medical instruments in person, such as a catheter (yuck, gross, but probably necessary), an amnio hook for breaking the amniotic sack if necessary, and forceps, the dreaded instrument (that I can still thank for my wonky eye 30 years later).

It was also helpful to see a box full of all the items the INOVA hospitals provide its patients for personal care, with a reminder to stock up on free extras from the hospital before being discharged. (Disclaimer: it's about to get real, again, people.)

Specifically, the hospital provides those maxi pads you've no doubt heard about that add a whole new meaning to the word maxi...seeing one in person was...eye opening? Something to look forward to. But there were several other postpartum supplies I'd read about but didn't know if I'd be receiving from the hospital including:

plastic-encased ice packs (the kind you twist to activate) and then put inside your ~~giant adult diaper~~ maxi pad
Tucks witch-hazel pads, which are not just for hemorrhoid relief but also for soothing stitches
a peri bottle for rinsing your lady parts after using the bathroom
Advil, because when you're no longer pregnant ibuprofen is safe again and (at least the INOVA staff believes) better at postpartum pain relief than Tylenol (acetaminophen)
stool softeners, not a maybe...a must!
and, most surprisingly, a sitz "bath tub," which is basically a glorified potty chair you position over the toilet to help with vaginal pain relief (I just went there)

And perhaps the biggest take-home message of all that I hope you, dear reader, will apply to your own life: go tell your mother how much you love her RIGHT NOW.

P.S. Two points I forgot to mention as funny sidenotes:

1) Clearly this class came at the right time, not only as I hit 36 weeks pregnant, but also because two nights ago I woke up from a horrible nightmare where I gave birth to a 15-pound baby (by c-section, of course) and when I woke up from my general anesthesia and asked what happened, even my doctor said, "It was not pretty."

2) Despite my organized, be-prepared-in-advance tendencies, I was tied with another woman as being the most pregnant woman in childbirth class. We are both due the first couple days of January, but everyone else is due in mid-to-late February. So, it looks like a lot of people take a one-day childbirth class when they're between 28 and 30 weeks pregnant.

Baby class 1: Baby-ready dogs

2011-11-29T21:34:00.000-05:00

I recently alluded to the fact that we've been busy taking some classes to get ready for Baby Awesomerod's arrival. Specifically, we've attended a baby-ready pet class, a newborn care class, and this weekend we'll be attending our childbirth class extravaganza. So, as a service to you, but also as a way for me to keep all the information straight, I thought I would share with you the highlights, Cliffs-Notes style (or Spark-Notes style, if you were born after 1990).

We found out about this free pet class through our friend Mimi who was one trimester ahead of me and therefore a great source of information. We attended the class offered for free through the Animal Welfare League of Arlington, which offers one two-hour class per month. The group's intention is to provide the services soon-to-be parents can use in advance to help reduce the number of animals brought to shelters as a result of the birth or adoption of a baby. If you're local, I can recommend this class as a reassuring way to spend two hours of your life while picking up a few hints along the way. If you're not local, check to see if you local shelters, rescues or ASPCAs offer similar services.

Going into this class, I had two main apprehensions surrounding our dogs and babies:

1) Maxwell is perfectly comfortable around people of all sizes...except babies. Of course, his actual interactions with babies have been fairly limited, seeing as we're not going to approach a random baby on the street with our 85-pound dog, nor have there been a lot of babies in our home. Specifically, I've watched Maxwell's baby interactions through his responses to my little niece, and that has only occurred twice. Overall I would say he was too interested in her when she visited, to the point that he almost seemed obsessive.

2) Doc barks (in a really annoying way) if he is not fed the second we arrive home from work, regardless of the actual time. I can barely keep it together when I hear his incredible bark right now, and I don't have a baby. I am sure that when you add screaming baby and barking dog together I could easily lose my mind.

After our brief introductions among the dozen other yuppie couples in attendance at the November class, the two instructions raised their eyebrows (slightly) at Matt and me and said, "Wow, looks like you two have your work cut out for you." Not exactly reassuring words from the people whose job is to try to keep your dogs out of their shelters.

Fortunately, as the evening continued I did take away many practical points.

Before baby arrives
Have lots of high-value treats on hand -- not your typical kibble -- so that the dogs know you mean business when you practice some of the techniques below. Cheese or bacon divided into small pieces could also work.

Perhaps the most helpful command you can teach your dogs to master (or the one our dogs especially need the most) is "leave it." This command applies to just about everything -- people, objects, food...most importantly, the future baby. One way to do this is to put a high-value treat in your hand, put your hand close enough to the dog that he could take the treat out of your hand, but keep repeating "leave it" while you open and close your hand. Only give the dog the treat when he is relaxed and not lunging for the treat.

Start playing with any baby toys or baby gear that moves or makes noises. Praise the dogs when they are able to ignore the noises and movement.

Play a CD or Internet clips of crying babies. Gradually increase the amount of time you play these at once as well as the volume, and praise the dogs when they ignore the noises and exhibit calm behaviors. Our class came with a free baby noises CD that we need to start playing for our dogs.

If your dogs are afraid of moving objects, such as bikes, skateboards, strollers, take your dogs on walks with your stroller to help desensitize them to the object and the movement.

Start slowly adjusting your dogs' routines so they do not undergo one large, immediate change when the baby arrives.

Avoid aimlessly petting your dogs when, for example, you're sitting on the sofa. The more they expect to get constant attention, the harder it will be for them to adapt when the baby arrives.

Help your dogs find mental stimulation through activities or toys that provide exercise and lots of entertainment. Our instructors recommended the Kong Wobbler (a kibble dispenser) as one way to change up the feeding routine to help dogs keep themselves busy, stimulated and obtaining rewards.

Do not allow your dogs to go into the baby's room without your permission. It's best to make the room off limits (and I'll admit I have not done this...the dogs enjoy sitting on the floor of the nursery while I'm folding baby clothes or organizing the closet or tackling a little DIY project. Oh well.)

After the baby's birth
Here's one that you've probably heard of even if you're not a pet owner: before you introduce your dogs to your baby, introduce your dogs to an object that contains your baby's scent, such as a hat, a blanket, a onesie. Here's the part that I didn't realize: the dogs should smell the item and receive praise and rewards during this time, but the dogs SHOULD NOT tug on the item or try to lay on it.

Before you return home from the hospital, have a family member or friend take your dogs on a nice long walk to get out their energy. Then when you pull up in the driveway, hand your baby off to that person while you greet your dogs. Then hold your baby while you introduce your dogs to your baby.

Always keep your baby positioned above your dogs so that your dogs know your baby is above them in the hierarchy of the family (sorry Max and Doc! You're about to be demoted.)

One concern I raised during the question and answer portion of the evening is what to do if our dogs try to jump on us while we're seated and holding the baby. One suggestion is to train the dogs to sit at a distance from us -- for example, have the dogs sit on a special bed or pillow placed away from the couch. In an ideal situation, the answer is that I should stand and turn away from the dog (though I could see myself breastfeeding and not being able to stand up and turn away that second). Standing up and turning away is the same way to respond if our dogs jump on guests when they arrive (though I realize it's harder for guests to do this than it is for us to do so).

Speaking of guests, guests should greet the dogs first before greeting the baby so that the dogs do not view the baby as something that only takes away attention. Another good idea is for guests to give the dogs treats when they arrive. I think we'll be keeping some high-value treats downstairs so guests can do this as they walk in the door.

The biggest point the instructors wanted to emphasize that is hopefully obvious to you is this one: never leave your baby alone with your pet.

What else would you recommend doing before or after your baby arrives to help encourage positive interactions between pets and babies?

My ultimate baby to-do list

2011-11-27T18:44:00.000-05:00

There are lots of baby to-do lists out there, and you'll get advice from plenty of people (solicited and unsolicited) regarding what exactly you need to do when before having a baby. There's the popular baby to-do list on The Bump, which is quite similar in style to the list you may have gone through on The Knot before you got married, but it's filled with things I felt didn't apply to me. Plus, The Bump's list puts an icon of a crying baby next to any "overdue" items (I kid you not) which has the added benefit of making you feel like an unfit parent long before you've even given birth.

I realize I haven't shared the stories behind some of the items on the checklist below, so this is also a type of preview of some of the posts I've got planned in the coming weeks before the baby's arrival.

So, without further ado, here's my personal list I've been following:

Before getting pregnant

Work/finances

Know your work leave policies and aim to plan accordingly. Do you qualify for FMLA? Is there a "better time" to have a baby based on your work situation?
Quadruple check your finances. Do you plan to take extended maternity leave? Is this realistic? How will you pay for childcare and other baby expenses?

Health/appointments

Look closely at your health and lifestyle. Do you need to lose weight, cut down on alcohol/caffeine, eat healthier foods, exercise, get more sleep, address your mental health, etc.?
Start taking a prenatal vitamin (or multivitamin with plenty of folic acid) at least three months before trying to conceive. (I've read some news of more recent studies that suggest that taking a prenatal vitamin at least six months before trying to conceive might provide the optimal benefits, but I'm clearly no expert.)
Get any blood work you can for genetic screenings, such as cystic fibrosis. See what you could be a carrier for based on your ethnicity.
Read some pregnancy books/websites so you get a small sense of what you're in for.
If you're using hormonal birth control, consider going off birth control three months before trying to conceive so you can see what's "normal" for your body. Also consider using a free site or app, such as Fertility Friend, to chart your basal body temperature. (These are the two things I did not do in the very beginning that I wish I had.)

First trimester
Honestly, I was so worried about having a miscarriage/in such disbelief about actually being pregnant that I spent most of the first trimester trying to simply eat as much healthy food as I could stomach and hold my breath between doctor's appointments as we waited for the heartbeat, blood work and ultrasounds. But, I did sort of get started with two things:

Look into major nursery purchases, such as a crib, dresser/changing table and chair.
Start investigating major baby gear purchases by talking to experienced friends and family and picking up a book such as Baby Bargains.

There are also a couple decisions you can make early on:

Will you have any genetic testing conducted, such as an NT scan?
Will you find out the baby's sex?
Will you share your baby's name with anyone, if you decide to choose it before the baby's arrival?

Second trimester
I recommend trying to get as much of the serious physical preparation done as possible during this time. (This was great advice I received from veteran moms, and it worked out perfectly in my case that my second trimester coincided with my summer vacation. Well played, Baby Awesomerod.)

Nursery/baby gear

Start a registry! Figure out what store's policies, physical locations, websites, etc. best fit your lifestyle and those of your friends and family.
Clean out a space in your home for your future nursery, whether it's an entire room, a part of a room (such as your master bedroom) or even a walk-in closet (looks like lots of people in New York do this). In retrospect, cleaning out our office and reassigning its contents to many other parts of our house took a lot longer than I anticipated (read about it here, here, here and here). In fact, assembling the nursery felt small by comparison.
Decide on the look you want in your nursery. Gender neutral? Something super girly or super boy-y? (is there no equivalent of girly for boys?) Will you DIY anything, add items to your registry, etc.?
Before you do anything else, paint the nursery, if needed. It's much easier to do it before any furniture or gear arrives. I'm of the personal belief that if you're using low or no-VOC paint in a well-ventilated area, the pregnant lady can assist in the painting, but be prepared to get tired much more easily than you did when you painted your whole house.
Order/purchase nursery furniture if you haven't done so. Some cribs are considered special-order items and could take weeks to arrive. Don't forget a crib mattress! It likely does not come with your crib.
Get started on any DIY projects you might have up your sleeve. (Ours included making curtains, refinishing the dresser, making the crib skirt, lining the bookcase and dresser drawers...and a couple more I still have up my sleeve.)

Work/finances/legal matters

If your maternity leave policy is unclear (as I feel mine is) contact your Human Resources department. I also recommend following up with an email to someone with authority in HR clarifying more complicated questions so you have the responses in writing.
Write a will. (I will admit we need to get this finalized.)
Get life insurance beyond whatever is offered through your work. (I will also admit we need to do this one still. We should have done this forever ago.)
Fill out a medical directive/living will. (Sense a pattern here? I still need to fill this out and give it to my hospital. I think I'm dragging my feet on this one because it's pretty hard to figure out how long you'd like to be kept alive through life support, you know? Big stuff.)
Put all account information and passwords in writing. I am the handler of everyday financial matters in our house, while Matt is responsible for taking the lead on big, life-altering decisions (see will and life insurance above). We pay everything online, so, in the event that I'm in the hospital, dead, or simply overwhelmed with early motherhood, I thought I should put all our account login and password info in writing (and literally in writing, not stored electronically for security purposes) so that Matt could have access to everything in one place. My biggest discovery? We have a lot of accounts. Wow, so many logins and passwords to track.

Health/appointments/classes

Get your flu shot if you're pregnant during flu season! Remember that your partner should also get a flu shot to protect the baby for its first six months of life.
Register for childbirth classes or other related classes. We are fortunate that Kaiser Permanente offers several free prenatal classes, but we also registered for a one-day six-hour Childbirth Express class that we'll be attending in early December.
Register for a hospital tour.
Register for any other special tours/classes/appointments, such as a pet readiness class, if one is offered in your area.
Interview/decide on a pediatrician.
Interview/decide on a daycare provider, if necessary.
If you're having a boy, look into the pros and cons of circumcision and decide on with your partner on which route you'll take.

Mom readiness

Buy maternity clothes. Decide on what you truly need and how, if at all, you'd like to extend the life of your non-maternity clothing (through items such as a BeBand or bra extender). In terms of designated maternity clothes, I purchased (or received as gifts) the following that got me through my entire pregnancy: three pairs of work pants (black, gray and khaki), one pair of nice jeans, two pairs of maternity leggings (black and gray), two maternity dresses, one jean skirt (specifically this one from Old Navy that I highly recommend, but remember to order it one or two sizes smaller than your normal size), one nicer skirt, four long-sleeve maternity shirts, eight short-sleeve maternity shirts (tip: scour the sale rack of Target's maternity section as well as Gap Maternity [located inside some Baby Gap stores]). Of course, I wore a lot more than this during pregnancy because I had plenty of non-maternity dresses, tops (of the tunic variety) and cardigans that could work (though I did not have as many of any of these items that wound up working as I had hoped they would pre-pregnancy).

Third trimester
This is the trimester of the nitty-gritty, with lots of items that can't really be accomplished until you've acquired the majority of your baby gear and until you're closer to your due date.

Nursery/baby gear

Put finishing touches on nursery decor, including items such as wall art, decals, mobiles, shelving, etc.
Keep track of baby gifts. I recommend making a spreadsheet where you also add a column indicating whether you've sent a thank you note.
Write all thank you notes for baby gifts.
Assemble/test all baby gear to make sure it's in working order.
Return/exchange non-functioning items, duplicate gifts, etc.
Purchase whatever baby gear essentials you still need for the early days. In our case we needed changing pad covers, some more basic baby clothes (in the newborn and 0-3 month sizes), crib sheets, bottles, baby rectal thermometer, baby nail clippers.
Fill out all product safety recall information. Most of this can now be done online through the manufacturers' websites. Keep all baby gear receipts and manuals organized together in your filing system (we've added a Baby folder to our filing system, and it's already bursting at the seams).
Purchase the necessary baby health/toiletries to get you started, including newborn diapers, wipes, diaper rash cream, saline spray.
Wash all baby clothes and baby gear (receiving blankets, swaddlers, burp cloths, bibs, bedding, towels and wash cloths, changing pad covers, blankets).
Determine and institute an organizational system for all baby clothes and gear. Purchase containers or storage solutions for closets and dressers.
Install your car seat. Then contact your local fire department's non-emergency line and see if you can bring your car by to have the car seat installation inspected. (Many jurisdictions, ours included, have stopped doing this as a routine, organized event, but according to nurses at my doctor's office, the fire department still tells them they're happy to check car seat installation of anyone who comes in because they'd rather help you now than later.)

Work/finances/legal matters

If your employer handles initiation of maternity leave through a third-party company, contact them according to the company's policies. In my case, I have to contact Liberty Mutual at least 30 days before my expected due date.

Health/appointments/classes

Start kick counts at 28 weeks according to your doctor's instructions.
Pre-register with your hospital.
Prepare a "birth plan."

Mom readiness

Buy nursing-friendly clothing, such as pajama tops that button and nursing tanks. Invest in a couple nursing bars when you're pretty close to going into labor so you have a better sense of what size you'll need as your boobs will continue to grow up to and following labor.
Buy nursing accessories, such as nipple cream, gel soothies, nursing pads, pumping supplies.
Buy postpartum toiletries, such as sanitary pads, Tucks.
Schedule any personal maintenance appointments, such as a hair cut.
Pack hospital bag.

Home readiness

Check all smoke alarms and carbon monoxide detectors.
Consider minimal baby proofing. In our case this involved putting outlet covers in the nursery (right next to the crib, lest she should be a hyper-advanced newborn) and installing a permanent baby gate where we had a temporary and unsafe baby gate that has served for years as our dog gate (we did not install this new gate for the baby's sake right now but rather for the dogs and for ease of navigating our house with fewer free hands).
Stock up on batteries in various sizes to fit all your battery-operated baby gear. Although we're fans of rechargeable batteries, baby gear can require so many batteries that it seemed impractical to wait for batteries to charge when you're dealing with a crying baby.
Stock up on household goods such as toilet paper, paper towels, cleaning supplies (especially a mild detergent for cleaning baby clothes and stain removal) and toiletries for mom and dad.
Stock up on pantry essentials.
Cook and freeze some meals for the early days of parenthood.

Pets

Make sure pets are up to date on appointments and shots.
Get animals groomed, as necessary (we need to get our dogs' nails clipped asap!)
Stock up on pet food and medications.
Train your animals as much as possible to adjust to having a little one in the house.
Have a plan for who will take care of the animals when you go into labor, when you're in the hospital, or even in the early days home from the hospital.

Sentimental items

Decide on a baby name if you haven't already. (This, I realize, isn't exactly a sentimental item, but I didn't know where else to put it!)
Purchase and begin a baby book, or DIY your own.
Prepare a baby's arrival mass email and/or text message list (with all recipients bbc'ed so no one can mistakenly reply all) so you fill in the information and hit send after the little one arrives.
Decide on a birth announcement.
Make a mailing address list of birth announcement recipients and make labels or address envelopes, if possible.

That's all I've got! What did I forget?

I did it...I organized my socks

2011-11-26T07:57:00.000-05:00

Put this on the list of "things that I must accomplish before the baby arrives" not because it really changes my life on any level, but because I have a weird perhaps nesting-type compulsion to get this done. During my Container Store run last weekend I picked up this $7.99 32-compartment drawer organizer. I decided against buying another set of the Real Simple clear organizers I picked up for $4 at Bed Bath and Beyond for my hosiery drawer because I felt like my socks are bulkier and need to be more compartmentalized.

Now, these before and after shots are not really fair because I took the before photo at night and the after photos during the day, so it's sort of like those bad plastic surgery photos where, if the person was only smiling in the original photo, the transformation would not be nearly as significant. Oh well.

Before -- pajamas and socks intermingle in the wild.

After -- even Matt admits that he would like a sock drawer organizer. (He says something along the lines of, "I don't need it, but I wouldn't be upset if you decided to do that for me." This will likely be a maternity leave mini-project.)

This is on my ever-growing list of tiny things that make my life a little easier and give me a little more order over my space on this planet.

Discounted cloth diapers

2011-11-24T13:33:00.000-05:00

As you might remember from my baby registry post, one of the items I was most hoping to receive from my registry was cloth diapers. Ask and you shall receive. Several friends gifted me with them at my baby shower, and my friend Katy even demonstrated, much to the intrigue of all present, how these Bum Genius 4.0 diapers work. (People like my mother, who cloth diapered us old-school style, giant diaper pins and all, were especially amazed -- these are not your mom's cloth diapers.)

So, I was really happy when Katy told me the other day about her friend's shop that specializes in cloth diapers and related accessories (in addition to other green-baby products). Right now we have 10 cloth diapers to work with, and I feel like we should at least double that amount so we only have to launder the diapers every other day, as opposed to having the washing machine running non-stop in our house.

The store is called The Cloth Nook, and right now you can get 20% off all orders as well as free shipping. I guess this comes in perfect time, in case you were planning to buy someone you love this highly practical gift for the holidays (but probably the only person in the world who would appreciate such a gesture would be yours truly).

Because I believe the owner is (sadly) closing her store, not all diaper colors and closures are available, but I was able to snag five Bum Genius 4.0 snap closure diapers each at 20% off, and I basically never see these diapers on sale. Now we'll have on hand 15 cloth diapers in a variety of colors (2 clementine, 2 twilight, 1 moonbeam, 1 zinnia, 3 blossom, 3 butternut, 2 sweet, 1 bubble). I still want to get 5 more diapers, the ribbit and the grasshopper ones, because they seem ideal for our daughter's future wardrobe as I am partial to green in all things in general (including Kermit the Frog, whom I am excited to see in his new movie).

Now, back to baking. Have a happy Thanksgiving!

Desk organization: Making the most of (new) limited storage

2011-11-21T21:24:00.000-05:00

In our attempts to get our house ready for Baby Awesomerod's arrival (in six weeks!) one truth has become increasingly apparent: we have less space. Specifically, at this moment, we have less storage. When one of your bedrooms is taken over by baby stuff and you basically have to figure out how to lose a room in your house without cluttering up the rest of the house, it's time to start getting creative.

You might recall that our desk underwent a major downsizing this summer when we switched from a large, old IKEA desk to a very small but quite functional Target desk. This also means the original desk of four drawers and a large attached filing cabinet area has been narrowed down to a desk of one narrow drawer. I've had to store paper products in the guest room's nightstand, which is fine considering that piece of furniture was completely empty before. I've also abandoned my long-standing cord organization system and reduced it down to the bare essentials inside our new small desk.

Until this weekend, the inside of the new desk looked like this:

Not bad, right? I've taken the items I use most often and kept them within easy reach.

But the new cord/charger system was still getting on my nerves.

And my mismatched mini containers inside the drawer were all different heights, and one in particular kept scraping against the inside of the top of the drawer every time I'd open it.

So over the weekend I took a trip to the happiest place on earth -- aka The Container Store -- and used a gift certificate my fantastic senior students from last year gifted me (thanks again, guys!). Among many other things, mostly for the baby, that I picked up there is this 6-piece acrylic desk organizer that is absolutely perfect for the width and height of my drawer. I had no idea if it would fit or not while I was in the store (I forgot to write down the dimensions in my handy little notebook) but I took a quick estimate and was pleasantly surprised to discover that I'd found perfection. (Fun fact, speaking of my notebook: I was looking inside my notebook at my list of items to pick up and dimensions to keep in mind when a Container Store employee stopped me and said, "Wow, a whole notebook, I am really impressed with your organization!" You know you've made it when a Container Store employee makes that comment.)

Although it's not a major change, having a better cord solution is already making finding my camera accessories a little easier. I'll share more of my Container Store acquisitions soon. All I can say is it's a good thing that store is not particularly convenient to my house.

Nursery progress: Art!

2011-11-19T06:46:00.000-05:00

I realize I've been absent from the blog for over a week. We've had one intense week, mostly filled with activities that involve getting ready for the baby. It all started last Saturday with my fantastic baby shower thrown by two of my closest and dearest friends, and it's been followed by two different baby-preparation classes as well as lots of baby-gear assembling and baby shopping and baby list-making and baby organizing. More on all that soon. In case you can't tell by the timing of this post, now I'm back to experiencing some of my first and early second trimester trouble sleeping (despite being tired), so I'm going to stay away from complex posting for now. As I collect my thoughts, here's something quick I can share as we put the finishing touches on the nursery.

Long before I got pregnant, I had been starring in Google Reader (for the last two years, apparently) artwork I would like for a potential nursery inspired by different blogs I read. After lots of filtering, I narrowed down my choices to my top three options.

There's this great round-up for reading-related art at Ohdeedoh. I was contemplating a few of them.

Then there's these and these posters with strong messages for strong girls at Switcheroo.

I'm thinking when Baby Awesomerod is older that I'll probably get her a couple of these to inspire some of the qualities I hope she'll possess, like independence and confidence.

But I ultimately went with this print from Sycamore Street Press. I find the text beautiful, the colors ideal for the nursery (and at 11" by 14" the print is the right size for the space I've got), and to top it off I'm a sucker for letterpress, so I hope it's something our little girl will treasure until she's old and gray.

It makes me tear up just reading it, so I hope that in a few short weeks when I'm changing diapers at 3 a.m. I can look up at this print hanging above the changing table and be reminded of the big picture.

There are a couple other works of art we already owned (one from my childhood, one from Matt's family) getting ready for the nursery walls, and once everything is up I'll show you the finished product.

What no one told me to expect (a third round of pregnancy observations)

2011-11-10T18:29:00.000-05:00

Here's my third trimester installment of pregnancy observations (click here and here to see my first and second trimester observations.), this time accompanied by some baby/toddler/little kid photos for fun.

Even though I may have read more about pregnancy than the average woman before I got pregnant, most of what I was prepared to expect was fairly obvious. I "knew":

1) I would gain weight. (True: as of today's appointment I've gained 20 {!} pounds at 32 weeks. I'm actually surprised by how much I've gained, seeing as I went through almost half my pregnancy without gaining any weight. It has really picked up, but it's still {thankfully} mostly just noticeable in my stomach. I don't know how much longer that luck will last. I will say that in the past two days no fewer than seven people have asked if I am within a week or two of my due date, and a couple asked if I'm having twins. I'm not offended, mostly amused.)

2) I would have trouble sleeping. (Partly true: I wake up at least once, sometimes twice, every night to pee, but neither baby kicking nor general discomfort so far has kept me from getting a solid eight hours of sleep each night.)

3) I would be more tired than I am normally. (False: I have taken far fewer naps in pregnancy than I took before being pregnant. Perhaps it's because I'm running on adrenaline. Perhaps it's because I was a little down-in-the-dumps about my prospects of getting pregnant while trying to conceive and therefore my tiredness was more psychosomatic. Either way, I marvel at Matt who seems to take more naps now than he did before we conceived.)

First day home from the hospital...how does my mom look so well-rested?

4) I would have nausea, morning sickness, or both. (Partly true: I never had what I'd call true morning sickness, though I did have my period of intense food aversions from weeks 6 to 12.)

5) I would be emotional. (Partly true: I still get weepy when I think about my little girl's future, or when I see a sappy commercial, etc., but I've only had about one totally irrational emotional moment when I got really, really upset about the wrong color of white that a contractor painted on our house as he fixed our bay window after our latest round of HOA inspections. And I got really upset with Matt after I hiked the black diamond at 24 weeks pregnant, but that, my friends, was totally justified.)

Just a wee one, about two months old.

6) My boobs would grow. (True: Fact: And all my girlfriends have admired my new girlfriends.)

7) I would have cravings. (False: Yes, I faced food aversions, but I haven't had true cravings. Sure, I've wanted some blue cheese and some salt and vinegar chips, but I always want those things.)

8) I would be forgetful. (False: I still find the term "pregnancy brain" offensive in the same way that I find men saying that women should not go into politics because of PMS offensive. Of course, you might experience "pregnancy brain," but I will proudly shout out that I have not.)

Someone must have mastered tummy time...

9) I would get really swollen. (Not yet: Jury's still out on this one. I can easily see this happening by the bitter end, but so far, so good.)

10) I would get stretch marks. (Not yet: Chalk this up to being fortunate to have relatively good genes, or gaining weight slowly. Or perhaps next week I'll suddenly be plagued by stretch marks.)

But then there are all those little things that I either read about in passing or never heard about at all that have come true. This is where it gets real. You might accuse me of oversharing here, and that's fine, so if you'd rather not know the nitty-gritty, you should stop here (but the act of reading a blog is in essence an act of voyeurism, so I figure you're along for the ride. After all, what's the point of sharing if you're not honest?)

Here are my two disclaimers:
1) I am sure your pregnancy was/is/will be different from mine, but the following is a collection of what I've found (and other friends have found) surprising. Everyone's different, blah blah blah.

2) Please don't take this list as me complaining. I am still loving being pregnant and feel so lucky to have this chance to be an almost-mom. I really can't wait.

So here's my list of What I Wish Someone Had Told Me to Expect:

1) How little of my wardrobe would actually fit me in late pregnancy. In the two or three years leading up to getting pregnant, whenever I'd buy new clothes somewhere in the back of my mind I'd think, "Could I wear this when I'm pregnant?" We're blessed to be living at a moment in fashion history when styles are basically made for pregnant women. Or so I thought. And then I hit about 26 weeks pregnant. And then even those non-maternity-yet-should-be-pregnancy-friendly items stopped working. Flow-y tops? They don't necessarily work. In fact, in my experience, most of them don't work. If there are any buttons or zippers involved, count it out for me. This has more to do with rib-cage expansion than anything else. So, if you're planning to have a baby in the next year or two and think stocking up on pregnancy-friendly wear is a good plan, you might reconsider, just because by your third trimester you'll have to suck it up and buy some true maternity wear anyways, so what's the point? Show off your hot bod now.

2) How uncomfortable it is to sit for longer periods of time. Most pregnant women are forbidden from flying at 34 weeks or thereabouts. I took my last flight of my pregnancy at 24 weeks, and it was five of the most uncomfortable hours of my life. I could not imagine flying now at 32 weeks. Yikes. I can't even sit still for more than about 30 minutes at a time. I've also developed a case of restless legs syndrome many nights in bed. My body is tired but my legs keep moving.

3) How I would have to sit completely upright. I've now reached the point where everything in my torso is squashed together. I didn't fully understand this phenomenon until the last few weeks. Now if I sit hunched over at all it really feels like my lungs are compressed and I'm losing oxygen. So, being pregnant is now an exercise in improving my posture, which isn't a bad thing, seeing as my posture is less than stellar.

4) How I would lose my breath after talking for too long. I talk constantly as a teacher, but lately I've found that I can't keep going like I used to without taking deep breaths. I am also trying not to waste my breath, which is why I'd rather scowl at those annoying 16-year-olds who insist on making farting noises during class (yes, you read that correctly) rather than spend my energy telling them it's unacceptable. So far scowling is working out fine.

5) How much my skin would itch. Although I have not gotten stretch marks (yet) my skin around my abdomen is clearly being stretched to the max and it will only get worse. On certain days my skin is totally itchy; on other days it's not noticeable at all, so I'm guessing I'm itching the worst during a Baby Awesomerod growth spurt. She's been having a lot recently.

6) How you can develop a hernia during pregnancy. My doctor thought I had a hernia in my upper right thigh. Good news from yesterday's appointment is that I do not appear to have a hernia, just a really uncomfortable vein. Of everything I've experienced so far in pregnancy, aside from my 6-12 week food aversions, I'd say this troublesome vein has given me the most discomfort. It's best at night when my leg has had time to decompress.

7) How much constipation sucks. OK, so TMI, perhaps, but this is one thing I'd heard about that I still found surprising. I've heard some horror stories, and, well, they're for real. Pregnant women are more likely to get constipated because 1) your body is trying to hold onto every last nutrient possible for the baby and 2) everything is compressed in your body. There are ways to combat, this, but in my experience no way to make it go away 100 percent. Among other things, try: 1) drinking lots of water, 2) walking/staying active, 3) stool softeners (add this to the Pregnancy Essentials Shopping List, under the "This is For Real" category), 4) Fiber One bars, 5) fiber supplements. I've done everything but the fiber supplements, but I'll be picking those up soon.

For those of you women who've given birth or you pregnant ladies out there, what has surprised you most?

Simple travel art

2011-11-08T06:33:00.000-05:00

Whenever we return from a trip abroad, we always bring back with us some small change (after doing a very good job spending our last equivalent of $5 U.S. on things like chocolate and Gatorade at the airport). So I throw the small foreign change with all our American small change, which I take to Coinstar about twice a year and convert to an Amazon giftcard, inevitably annoyed to realize that I forgot once again not to mix the American and foreign currency when Coinstar gets mad at me.

When we got back from Argentina this summer (I realize I still have not written about that trip -- whoops!) I rounded up all the small foreign change in the house and turned it into this simple art project.

I bought this basic black frame at Michael's. It's not exactly a shadowbox, but it's much deeper than your typical frame. Then I covered the backing in white paper and glued each coin down with craft glue. One or two coins, because of their shape and size, did not want to stick at first, so I did have to reapply some glue, but giving the glue ample time to dry solved that problem.

I used state quarters to signify our domestic travels to places like Hawaii for our honeymoon and the eight states we visited during our cross-country trip (as you can see, I'm still waiting to find a bunch of quarters of western states such as Colorado, Utah, and California to join our lonely New Mexico and Arizona quarters).

This easy art is a sentimental reminder of some of our most memorable travels together and a great way to turn loose change collecting dust into something more meaningful.

Kitchen line up: Repurposing place mats

2011-11-06T18:24:00.000-05:00

When we ventured to IKEA in September to pick up the Billy bookcase for the nursery, I also bought two sets of these Klistrig place mats, figuring that at $2.99 for a pack of 4 I could find plenty of uses for them either as just simply place mats or I could repurpose them to other areas of the house.

It took me about three hours to decide that I wanted to protect the shelves of our pantry with these, but then I quickly ran out of extras, and by that point I was determined to line all the drawers and a few cabinet shelves in our kitchen with these. So, over this past weekend I picked up six more packs from IKEA and got to work lining the most offensive cabinets and drawers.

With white cabinets and two giant dogs, the insides of our drawers and cabinets reveal wear faster than they would if they were traditional wooden cabinets. So, in order to attempt to semi-win my constant battle against dog hair, I figured these are a start. They're not exactly contact paper, but they're thin enough that they are easily cut down to size and they can be easily lifted out of the cabinets for quick cleaning, too. And they're super cute.

So, after emptying out the drawers...

...and giving them a much-needed wipe down...I created a template for each drawer or cabinet and pieced the place mats together like a puzzle.

I did not buy enough place mats to line every single cabinet in our kitchen, but instead I focused on the highly trafficked parts of the kitchen, the lowest-lying drawers (which are therefore most likely to collect dog hair and catch crumbs from the counters), and cabinets containing items that are likely to make the shelves dirty, like our baking supply mini-pantry.

It took me about two hours to complete this project, and it's now amazing to not have to look at scuff marks or sticky residue at the bottoms of our cabinets and drawers.

Nursery progress: Crib skirt done

2011-11-01T20:22:00.000-04:00

After making my first set of DIY no-sew curtains for the nursery, I thought I would try my hand at making a no-sew crib skirt. Once again I followed the advice of the Young House Love folks and pretty much identically copied their crib skirt post. So, I don't have much to add to that dialogue, though I can say that:

1) It took me much longer to find the right fabric for the crib skirt. I already have two other patterns in the nursery between the curtains and the Modge Podged gift wrap coating the back of the bookcase, so I don't want to add too much else. But, I'm also comfortable with things not matching perfectly, so I finally pulled the trigger and got a black-and-white modern patterned fabric.

2) I bought twice as much fabric as I needed. For the four panels of the crib skirt I needed two yards, not four. Whoops. I'm a newbie at this whole fabric purchasing experience.

3) I couldn't (and still have not) figured out how to work around the edges of the crib's metal frame, the portion that holds up the mattress. So, that section is not perfect, but it will do, and I'm probably its worst critic. (Something tells me the baby won't notice.)

4) Spending about $40 total to make a crib skirt (supplies = fabric, hem tape, and Velcro) is a way better deal than buying an entire crib bedding set that can run you in the hundreds of dollars. I have started to see some stores and some bedding lines carry crib skirts separate from an entire bedding set, but so far the options I've seen are pretty limited. Now that crib bumpers are a supposed no-no, maybe more companies will start selling crib skirts and all other nursery bedding items a la carte.

Despite a couple tiny setbacks along the way, making the crib skirt was an easy afternoon project, and I think it makes the crib appear less naked, especially now that the crib is adjusted to the highest setting in anticipation of Baby Awesomerod's arrival. Before I attached the crib skirt there was a lot of empty space exposed underneath the mattress frame.

Right now we have a patterned crib sheet on the mattress. It's only there because we bought it for our sweet niece's visit several weeks ago. We tasked her with breaking in our crib, and she was up for the challenge, but we needed a sheet. So, while this sheet isn't my first choice (we registered for these bright green sheets at Buy Buy Baby) it will do.

Now with the crib skirt, the crib's a little more jazzed up.

Matt also took a few minutes over the weekend to attach the IKEA Billy bookcase to the wall, and I took a few minutes to see what it looks like with a few items added in. You might recognize a few of the items as toys I preserved from my childhood (and rediscovered in our crawl-space clean out). I'm sure everything will get reshuffled as Baby Awesomerod accumulates her own loot, but for now we've added a little more life to our little nursery space.

Now that all the furniture is in place and the more significant DIY jobs are complete, all we have left to do in the nursery is:

1) Buy an ottoman for the chair.
2) Find and install floating shelves next to the window.
3) Decide on and purchase/make/arrange nursery art.
4) Figure out if we're going to have a mobile over the crib and/or changing table; if so, will I make it or buy it, and how will we hang it from our really high ceilings?
5) Organize items in closet and determine an organizational system for all baby supplies.

So, at this point I view the remaining items as gravy. Nothing is a necessity (well, I guess most of our nursery tasks have been non-necessities as babies don't truly require much in terms of physical possessions). There's no rush, but hopefully the final items can get settled before January, and hopefully she won't arrive early.

Recipe tip: Pumpkin Chocolate Whoopie Pies

2011-10-30T19:12:00.000-04:00

As the Everyday Food fairy continues to grace us with our complimentary subscription, I figured it was time to start trying some new recipes. Specifically, we wanted to take a new dessert to our friends' house this weekend for dinner, so I opted for these very fall treats: Pumpkin Chocolate Whoopie Pies.

At first I was worried they sounded complicated, as it involves making both the cookies and the chocolate frosting from scratch. But if you're looking for a medium-difficulty dessert -- somewhere between whipping up a batch of brownies from a mix and making an apple pie from scratch -- these are the way to go. And just about everyone seems to love anything involving pumpkin puree, even though somewhat shockingly this was the first time I'd ever opened a can of pumpkin puree.

The great thing about these whoopie pies is that they're really two desserts in one, so if you decide not to go the whoopie pie route, you can still have some killer pumpkin cookies.

Another observation: I followed the recipe to a T, and I wound up with twice as much chocolate frosting as I needed, so next time I would make half as much. I'll give you the complete recipe, though, so you can make the call on how much frosting you'd like. Enjoy!

Pumpkin Chocolate Whoopie Pies
(makes 10 whoopie pies)

Ingredients:
2 cups flour
2 teaspoons pumpkin pie spice
1 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
1/4 teaspoon table salt
2 large eggs
3/4 cup pumpkin pie puree
1 cup light-brown sugar
1/3 cup unsalted melted butter, plus 1/4 cup at room temperature
3/4 cup heavy whipping cream
2/3 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
1 3/4 cup powdered sugar

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Whisk together flour, pumpkin pie spice, baking powder, salt. In a separate bowl, whisk together eggs, pumpkin pie puree, brown sugar, melted butter and 1/4 cup cream. Add flour mixture to egg mixture and whisk until combined.

2. Drop dough in 2-tablespoon mounds, 1 inch apart, onto two parchment-lined baking sheets. Bake for 14 minutes, rotating sheets halfway through. Let cool completely before frosting.

3. Using an electric mixer, beat room temperature butter, 1/2 cup cream, cocoa powder and powdered sugar on medium-high until fluffy, about 2 minutes. Spread filling on flat side of cookies and sandwich together.

Nursery progress: Modge Podge in the house

2011-10-25T19:42:00.000-04:00

I have heard so much about Modge Podge on the Internets in the last couple years that I finally decided the nursery gave me an opportunity to try it out. It also helped me achieve my goal of adding those desired bright pops of color to the nursery's overall neutral palette of gray and white.

I decided to line the back of an inexpensive IKEA bookcase (this white Billy bookcase we bought a few weeks ago, to be exact) after being inspired by this post from IHeart Organizing about revamping a bookcase for bathroom storage. Even though Jen stenciled and painted the back of her bookcase, I decided the paper and Modge Podge route would be easier for me to tackle.

Then, inspired by this post from Young House Love about lining the drawers of their nursery dresser with pretty gift wrap, I did virtually the same thing to the inside of our nursery dresser drawers.

For both the bookcase and the dresser drawers I decided to use the same paper to create a consistent look. I figure the curtains are the biggest statement piece in the nursery, and I don't want to go too crazy with too many conflicting patterns in our relatively small room. I found thick single-sheet wrapping paper at World Market with a modern orange pattern (5 sheets at $2.69 each). I got my first-ever bottle of Modge Podge at Jo-Ann Fabrics (16 oz. for $8) a couple weeks ago.

If you've never before worked with Modge Podge, I have to say that it is a shockingly forgiving substance. It's sort of like Elmer's Glue (the old school kind), except something about its water-based make up means it's even easier to work with and glides on smoothly. When it dries it's perfectly clear, so you don't have to be worried about applying perfectly even coats to still get the results you're hoping for.

Here are my Modge Podging supplies all laid out: my giant bottle of matte finish Modge Podge as well as a foam brush I picked up in a bulk set from Michael's years ago.

After cutting the five pieces of gift wrap to fit in the bookcase backing and dresser drawers, I spread a thin layer of Modge Podge onto each surface and then immediately placed the gift wrap inside, taking care to press down firmly on the middle of the paper first and then smoothing the rest of the paper from the middle out to the edges of the surface to prevent bubbles.

I gave a little bit of drying time between getting the paper to adhere to the surfaces and then putting a layer of Modge Podge over the paper to protect the paper's surface, but I have to say that the hour or so I allowed for drying was not enough. If you are striving for absolute perfection -- absolutely no air bubbles -- definitely take the advice of the Young House Love folks and give yourself four hours of drying time between gluing the paper in and then sealing it.

In all honesty, as I approach the final stretch of pregnancy my patience is waning and my sense of urgency in regard to completing all projects is only increasing, so I decided on the express route (i.e. not striving for perfection). The good news is that there are no visible air bubbles on the back of the bookcase, but there are some inside one of the three dresser drawers.

Now that the Modge Podging is complete, one question remains: What to do about those pesky holes on the sides of the Billy bookcase? Granted, a few sets of holes will be filled in when I install the remaining four shelves. But most of the holes are going to be visible if I don't do anything. Although we have a Billy bookcase in a wood tone and we have the holes exposed on that one and it doesn't bother me, the holes are so much more prominent on this white bookcase. So, I feel like I should do something to make them less visible. One option would be the putty them up, but that seems semi-permanent and thus defeats the purpose of adjustable shelves. An idea from my in-laws is to cover them with ribbon, and I have orange ribbon that rather perfectly matches the gift wrap color.

But maybe you all have other ideas. What would you do? Suggestions welcome!

75% cooked

2011-10-24T20:34:00.000-04:00

I share this quick post because, after looking at a couple pictures of me 30 weeks pregnant, all I can think is, "This is getting for real, people."

And yes, it's official: I am starting to hit my students (accidentally) with my stomach. And this baby will not stop jumping. Watching my stomach jump all around and subsequently laughing out loud is my new favorite past time.

I have an actual mini-project post to share with a weekend update, so stay tuned.

My pregnancy essentials shopping list

2011-10-16T08:11:00.000-04:00

As I've been adjusting to this new stage of my life, I've had to adjust my shopping habits, too. Here are a few items that have been essential for me the first 28 weeks of my pregnancy.

1) Body pillow

This is the one item I already had-- it actually traveled with me to college -- though it has been resting in the guest room for nearly five years. I only started sleeping with the body pillow around the time I hit 20 weeks and my belly started to feel more defined. That's when I knew it was time to adopt side sleeping.

This is what our bed usually looks like now when I wake up: body pillow laying sideways across the bed. I sleep with the body pillow in two ways:

1) with my legs wrapped around it and my body turned to either the right or left side (I switch whenever I get up in the middle of the night to pee, which is always once, usually twice, and sometimes three times)

2) with the body pillow wrapped around my stomach like an inner tube as I lie on one of my sides

If you have a keen eye and a good memory, you may notice something else in the photo above: a new headboard! We finally bought an actual bed frame. This is one of those items left over from the summer to-do list that we wanted to take care of before Baby Awesomerod's arrival. Specifically, I'd been on a mission to find an upholstered headboard for some time now because I'm going to try breastfeeding, and we're going to try having the baby sleep in our room in her Pack N' Play in at least the very beginning. I wanted something soft to lean against at all hours of the night, and this bed frame from World Market fit the bill. Plus, at $400 it was the most affordable but still nice-looking one we could find. Extra bonus points for waiting until now to buy this: we used our 25% friends and family discount last week, so we saved $100. Booyah!

OK, back to business....

2) Bra extenders

Here's something you already know about pregnancy: your boobs will grow. One thing I did not realize as much is that my rib cage would also expand thanks to extra fluids, lung expansion and the growing uterus that seemingly crushes everything else in my body.

In the first half of pregnancy before your belly is proportionate to your boobs they will seem especially large. Lots of women I've spoken to have claimed to have needed a new bra in the first trimester. This was definitely not the case for me. Plus, I love my bras and want to extend their life as much as possible. My rib cage expansion is the main thing I needed to figure out how to work around. I know I'll have to change at the very end of pregnancy/early postpartum period to a nursing bra (or simply a different size bra) but I still have not broken down and purchased a new bra thanks to the wonder of the bra extender.

Jo-Ann Fabrics carries bra extenders in all kinds of styles -- three hook extenders, two hook extenders, magnetic extenders, traditional hook extenders. Frankly I found it a little overwhelming as I sifted through their collection to find the one that would work with the majority of my bras. So now I simply transfer my bra extender among my different bras. This investment of a few dollars has been well worth it.

3) Step stool

I'll admit that as a short person I've made some stupid decisions in the kitchen, jumping up onto our counter tops to grab items from high shelves. Now that I can barely bend over I decided that jumping on counter tops is probably not the safest practice, so I picked up one of these $15 folding step stools from Bed Bath and Beyond.

In retrospect, it's silly that I didn't get one of these sooner, seeing as it folds up so compactly and will fit in the nook between our fridge and the cabinet. But at least it will also be a good kid-friendly item to have in our house when we have a toddler.

4) Gilligan & O'Malley pajama bottoms from Target

Specifically, I picked up two pairs of these Slub Pajama Pants. Slub seems like the perfect word to describe these. I like the slub around my house wearing these with my belly feeling totally comfortable.

5) San Pellegrino Limonata

The perfect substitute for alcohol...sort of.

What would you add to the list?

Enjoy your lazy Sunday!

Easy jewelry access

2011-10-12T21:10:00.000-04:00

One thing that's true about how I get ready in the morning is that I try to do it as quickly as possible while still walking out the door appearing somewhat put together. Jewelry is a big help in the put-together look, but when my jewelry is hidden away I am less inclined to sift through it. A long time ago I shared with you my hanging necklaces display, which is one organizational strategy I've tried to make myself more inclined to wear jewelry, and it has worked. I've recently added an earring and bracelet display to the mix.

It took me a while to figure out how to better display my earrings and bracelets in a way that would work for me by not taking up too much space and not appearing cluttered while still encouraging me to access my jewelry more frequently. After checking out other organizers' ideas like the ones you'll find here I settled on the ceramic egg crates from Anthropologie for my earrings.

At $14 each, they are affordable and functional. The one downside of these is that they can more easily collect dust, but the fact that I actually wear earrings now most days outweighs that minor annoyance.

I also finally picked up this acrylic bracelet display at Jo-Ann Fabrics last weekend. It was a good investment of $7.99 (less 20 percent after a coupon -- holler!).

Reorganizing my jewelry has been a silly little task on my to-do list for months now, and I'm glad that after some earring reorganization this summer and bracelet reorganization this weekend I now have a much higher likelihood of wearing these items.

Best T-shirt ever

2011-10-11T18:33:00.000-04:00

I realize "Best T-shirt ever" may sound like major hyperbole, and perhaps it is, but I am really pleased with this purchase:

(Ignore my one rogue curl...such is my life.)

And despite the shirt's message, I am pleased to report that -- aside from a few friends' husbands, oddly enough -- I haven't had many inappropriate people try to touch my now 28-week-pregnant belly. (I am more than happy for my girlfriends to rub my belly because it's a novelty factor if nothing else. Plus I like for them to share in my happiness, and they possess all the same body parts as me.)

I found this gem through a giveaway on the blog Pregnant Chicken. While I did not win the giveaway, I did go straight to the Etsy seller DiscoBelly (awesome name) to make this purchase. Believe it or not, this is my first ever Etsy purchase, and while I love Etsy as a concept, I am determined to stay off the site unless buying a gift or hunting for some really specific item because I can imagine it could get addictive.

A special anniversary and a new lens purchase

2011-10-09T08:35:00.000-04:00

A year ago this weekend, during the last Columbus Day tax-free Energy Star appliance weekend in Virginia, Matt and I purchased our stainless steel fridge and dishwasher. We've been thoroughly enjoying them all this time. Not only do they look great but they function perfectly and -- perhaps most importantly to us -- make hardly any noise. This is a major life upgrade.

But, last week, my typical need for cleanliness or my pregnancy nesting instinct took over (call it what you will), and I realized that I had not thoroughly cleaned the fridge and freezer in the entire time we've owned it. Yes, I have cleaned out each produce drawer several times and wiped down sticky shelves on numerous occasions, but our beloved fridge has never received the head-to-toe treatment it deserves.

So I started with the freezer and my handy Clorox wipes, which I find to be the most effective (though I once again admit, perhaps least environmentally friendly) way of cleaning out the various poppy seeds from bagels and leaves from various vegetables that get stuck in the nooks and crannies of our fridge. We're not big freezer users (yet) so there wasn't too much to sort through, and I am not someone who has an amazing system for organizing the contents of our freezer or our fridge.

The fridge is more satisfying to organize than the freezer, and completely emptying it out and leaving it spotless before throwing out expired goods and rearranging the contents of the shelves made me feel amazingly accomplished.

I documented the freezer and fridge clean-out progress using our new 50 mm f/1.4 lens (for our Canon Rebel XTi DSLR) which just arrived in the mail midway through last week. (We bought it through the site Adorama rather than Amazon because the two sites were charging the same price, but Adorama threw in a free 58 mm UV filter and lens cleaning kit -- two things I've been wanting for some time.)

Here's the (completely unretouched) photo of our freezer contents taken at approximately 9 p.m. Wednesday using our original lens

And here's the same photo taken from the same spot in our kitchen using our new 50 mm lens

Because of the lighting in our house I still had to take both photos on manual settings with an ISO of 1600. Granted, when I take photos to post on this blog or share with friends I almost always retouch them, adjusting usually the exposure and sometimes the saturation. But I wanted to show you the raw files of these images to help you get a sense of what the new lens will do. Namely, while the new lens does not have zooming capabilities, it does have a much more important feature: the ability to take better photos indoors in really low light. Though you might not be able to appreciate it in the examples above, the photos taken with the new lens have way less digital noise (i.e. obvious grainy pixels) than the photos taken with the old lens.

Why did we get this new lens? Well, probably at this point for obvious reasons. As we prepare our lives for Baby Awesomerod, we want to be able to take a ton of pictures of her, and since she'll be arriving during almost the dead of winter, we figure we are going to take almost all our photos indoors in low lighting. We'd rather not take photos using the flash since it tends to have a rather jarring effect. Our friends Dawn and Jon have taken lots of adorable pictures of their daughter indoors using the same lens that inspired this purchase, and Matt, being the tech guru that he is, was totally happy to buy this lens after seeing what their lens could do.

I am totally thrilled to have a clean fridge AND a new awesome lens to document our lives. Now we need to get Photoshop Elements so I can learn to do a better job at editing photos.

How I feel about being pregnant

2011-10-02T13:29:00.000-04:00

I can't lie. I love it. I love being pregnant for the same reason I love Thursdays: anticipation. Thursday equals almost Friday, which equals two and a half days of doing whatever you want. Pregnancy equals imagining everything that is about to come, full of anticipation.

As I now officially enter my third and final trimester, I am fortunate to have had, up to this point, an easy pregnancy. I realize this likely clouds my judgement regarding pregnancy, but at the same time I was prepared for the worst (that's my pessimism for you -- thanks, Mom, for passing that trait to me), yet I was still looking forward to it all.

Years ago my friend Emily said she looked forward to one day being pregnant, and I totally laughed at her. Society teaches us that pregnancy is nine months from hell, when the woman becomes a raging maniac with out-of-control hormones and a skewed sense of reality, not to mention every possible bodily complication and discomfort known to man. Why would anyone look forward to this? Why would any sane woman agree to go through this? As a feminist I would even go so far as to say that pregnancy, childbirth and motherhood were things I could happily avoid because they seemed like punishment for being female (somewhere along the lines of Eve's original sin). Now two-thirds of the way through, I can say that these have so far been some of the happiest -- if not the happiest -- months of my entire life, and I cannot wait to be a mother, though the concept of childbirth is still freaking me out (more on that another time).

Now when I hear women complain about being pregnant or having a baby in the near future, it's a punch in my (size-of-a-soccer-ball) gut. If you don't want to have a baby, you don't have to, and there are ways to prevent it. If you want to have a baby, enjoy getting ready for your future.

I've been exceptionally busy, alert and self-reflective during this time so far, and I only imagine those experiences will increase in intensity in the final months leading up to Baby Awesomerod's arrival. The self-reflective element has really kicked in this past month, as for the ninth year of my life I've been placed in charge of 140 impressionable youth. I've wondered in awe at most of them because they are impressive teenagers, but I've shook my head at a few of them, asking myself what their parents did to make them that way and what Matt and I can do to avoid repeating those mistakes with our daughter.

I've also been emotional.

This is a pregnancy cliche that should not surprise you. Although I am mostly a calm, rational (and pessimistic) person on the exterior, whether I am pregnant or not I have strong opinions and emotions. But pregnancy and the anticipation of motherhood has helped bring those emotions more to the surface. This is specifically evidenced by the frequency of my crying episodes. Granted, almost all my tears shed have been happy tears, in fact insanely happy tears, something along the lines of, "Oh my god, I have a human inside me and I am so lucky and so ready to introduce her to the world."

Then there are my sappy tears, most recently evidenced by my burst of tears while driving and the song "I Hope You Dance" came on the radio. I hate that song. I despise it to the core of my being. Yet as Lee Ann Womack belted out those god-awful lyrics, I found myself thinking, "Yes, baby girl, I hope you do dance! I hope when you have the choice to sit it out or dance, you dance! Embrace the life ahead of you!" This, my friends, is out of character, but it still made me happy. And I actually did not change the channel, which is my gut reaction should that horrible song ever make it onto my radio.

Other things that I cannot handle would include this absolutely greatest Google commercial in the history of commercials.

Oh yeah, and this Pampers commercial, which, like the Google commercial above, makes me cry every single time I see it.

I'll get back to sharing mini-house projects and more organizational strategies next, but I wanted to take this little break as I embark on the final phase of pregnancy to share some thoughts lots of friends have been asking me about, but up until today I hadn't had the chance to put down in words.

Mpix 8 x 10 prints on sale

2011-09-27T04:22:00.000-04:00

I order actual printed photos only about once a year, and I placed an order with Mpix for a bunch of 4" x 6" photos a few weeks ago. I like having some recent photos on hand to swap into picture frames around the house, or to place in that imaginary scrapbook I never seem to make anymore, or to give to friends who might appreciate a particularly nice picture or two.

I didn't order any large photos this year because I ordered so many over a year ago when I printed a bunch of photos from our European vacation to create a photo collage on our dining room wall. But if I needed some 8" x 10" photos this year, now would be the time to buy them. Order from Mpix between now and Wednesday night at midnight, central time, and enter the code mpix8x10 for 50% off 8" x 10" prints (regularly $1.99, now $.99).

If you've never used Mpix before, let me assure you that the quality of prints is stellar, and if you have any sort of problems with the order, contact customer service immediately and they will rectify the situation stat. In my recent order one of the many photos I purchased arrived obviously bent, so I emailed customer service the order number and photo number, and by the next day my new photo had been FedExed to me overnight. That was a little unnecessary, but appreciated.